Breath by MAME

Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
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Brief: This is the story of Tul and Hin. This is a Sadistic Sexual relationship, and for a long time, it is not a healthy Sadomasochistic relationship. While all of the sex is consensual, consent is not sufficient without safety measures and aftercare practices in place. Therefore, please know that what you read here is first fiction and second not something you should do yourself. Within the scope of Sadomasochistic relationships, there are safe practices. Before trying Sadomasochistic sex, learn about those safe practices.

Synopsis: Tul and Hin are Thai college seniors. They attend one of the nation's top business schools. Tul, the firstborn of an affluent family has an extensive history of childhood trauma from his paternal grandmother's abuse, his mother's abandonment, an emotionally distant father, and the trauma of a violent kidnapping. Hin, the son of the family chauffeur and head cook, has been Tul's emotional support and often punching bag through it. Raised together, the two share a deep and complex bond rooted in both friendship and co-dependence.

Both Tul and Hin exhibit psychopathic tendencies and malignant narcissistic traits. The story unfolds during their final year of college and explores the shifting dynamics of their bond and Tul's vengeful relationship with his half-brother, Tinn. Interwoven flashbacks reveal the intricacies of their shared childhood and the experiences that shaped them.  

Despite their flaws and psychopathic neurotypes, the novel has an eventual happy ending—a resolution that honors their true selves and provides a nuanced portrayal of their psychological complexities.

Rating: NC17, with many TWs

Translation Status: Complete

TWs: BDSM (with death on the table), Bondage, Cheating, Child abuse, Choking, Classism, Covert recording of sexual acts, Description of animal abuse (not by a main character), Elder abuse, Gaslighting, Homicide, Kidnapping, Manipulation, Narcissistic abuse, Violence, Violent sex

Table of Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1: The Image Seen by Outsiders

Chapter 2: The Root of Evil

Chapter 3: Emotionless

Chapter 4: Or Merely Concealed?

Chapter 5: Just for Benefit?

Chapter 6: Dog Guarding Its Bone

Chapter 7: Reward or Punishment

Chapter 8: Everything in the Palm of His Hand

Chapter 9: A Heart Filled with Vengeance

Chapter 10: The Abandoned Child

Chapter 11: The Heart Without an Answer

Chapter 12: What Was Left Behind

Chapter 13: The Embodiment of Pain

Chapter 14: The Sole Refuge

Chapter 15: The Person Who Is Perfect

Chapter 16: The Transformation

Chapter 17: The Younger Brother and the Servant

Chapter 18: The One Who Must Leave

Chapter 19: Hearts Moving Toward Each Other

Chapter 20: Not Lowering Oneself, But Lowering the Heart

Chapter 21: Light and Shadow

Chapter 22: The One Who Steps In

Chapter 23: The Heart's Desire

Chapter 24: The Date

Chapter 25: Whom to Choose

Chapter 26: Must Have Everything

Chapter 27: A Place to Rest the Heart

Chapter 28: Birthday

Chapter 29: Born to Love

Chapter 30: Just Us

Chapter 31: Toward Reality

Chapter 32: Faen Sao (Girlfriend)

Chapter 33: When She Comes to Reclaim Her Place

Chapter 34: Bloody Awful Surprise

Chapter 35: He Is with Her, and She with Him

Chapter 36: When the Heart Leads the Way

Chapter 37: Dead End

Chapter 38: Do Not Leave Me

Chapter 39: When the World Shatters

Chapter 40: Dream Family

Chapter 41: When the Heart Breathes Again

Epilogue

Special Chapter 1: The First Night in Years

Special Chapter 2: Nong Phupha and Khun Kon Hin