Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
~~~
“Are you sure, Graph?”
“He kicked me out. How can I have the nerve to stay any longer?” Krittithee said.
Right now, a luxurious sports car was parked silently in front of the famous politician’s mansion. The driver turned to ask the young man beside him, whose eyes were still red and bruised, for confirmation. That question made Krittithee lower his head slowly, speaking in a voice filled with anger, resentment, and sadness, until Phawit himself let out a long sigh.
“Giving up just like this?”
“Is there even a way to win, Phîi?” Krittithee asked.
The one who had always been stubborn retorted, raising a self-pitying smile. Phawit shook his head slightly, placed a hand on the young man’s head, and shook it gently.
“Get some rest. Tell me when you’re ready. I’ll come pick you up.”
“It’s useless, Phîi Phawit. If he doesn’t want me to stay, he’ll just throw me out anyway.” Krittithee said.
The words meant that if Pakin didn’t come to get him, how could Krittithee have the nerve to endure staying in that house?
“Anyway, thank you for the ride, and for teaching me many things,” Krittithee said quickly, then opened the door and got out of the car swiftly, threw his bag over his shoulder, and took long strides, disappearing into the building without looking back. Normally, Phawit would be slightly annoyed with the ill-mannered young man, but now he understood.
A short time ago, Krittithee suddenly walked in carrying his backpack and asked for a ride home. At first, Phawit intended to refuse, but those pitiful eyes made him soften and bring Krittithee back, ignoring Panchai’s objections to wait for the young master, who was still discussing business with his friend.
Everyone needs to step back and regroup sometimes, Phawit thought.
Phawit told himself because he believed something in Krittithee made him believe that wasn’t the look of someone who had given up.
If you asked Krittithee how he felt right now, his answer would be that he didn’t know.
I don’t know how much it hurts, Krittithee thought.
I don’t know how much it aches, Krittithee thought.
I don’t know how much I’ve cried, Krittithee thought.
And I don’t know how to win his heart, Krittithee thought.
The driving force of not knowing, and being looked down upon as incompetent, was making Krittithee decide something. So, even though he was returning home for the first time in two weeks, Krittithee didn’t bother asking for his father or mother, wasting the servants’ time with answers like “not home,” “don’t know where they went,” or “sleeping with someone.” In this house, whether Krittithee was here or not, his value was no different.
Therefore, what Krittithee did was open the wardrobe and grab lots of clothes to throw onto the bed. However, it wasn’t about dressing meticulously to meet an important person, but rather choosing which outfit made him look the most adult, until the image of Phawit flashed into his head.
Def-cut jeans, a wide-neck long-sleeved shirt, and designer accessories were transported and laid out all over the bed, alongside the silver card.
Yes, curiosity, the desire to experiment, and the desire to win were pushing Krittithee in the direction Pakin did not want.
Snap
“I have to find out! I have to know what kind of person Phîi likes!” Krittithee said fiercely as he grabbed all the items and headed straight to the bathroom.
Tonight, Krittithee would use the card he had just received.
When the clock’s short hand had just passed nine, Krittithee got out of a taxi, looking straight at the luxurious club in the city center where tourists streamed in continuously. Especially on a weekend like this, various luxury cars of many nationalities turned into the parking lot, making it look like a large luxury car showroom. But that wasn’t what Krittithee was interested in; he was interested in the owner of this club.
“You’re underage, entry is not permitted, Khrap,” the staff said.
However, the moment Krittithee reached the door staff, he was blocked. Krittithee pulled the card from his pants pocket.
“What if I have this?” Krittithee asked.
Thud
“Please come right in, Khrap,” the staff said.
“Who’s that? Never seen him before.”
“Right. But he’s holding a VIP card. Who is that young man?” people murmured.
Krittithee heard the murmurs from behind, but he didn’t care. He just quickly stepped through the door, clutching the access card he had just obtained tightly. Then he scanned his surroundings, completely unaware of how much he had become the center of attention.
Right now, the handsome delinquent young man was wearing def-cut jeans and black ankle boots that made his legs look long and slender. On top, he wore a dark long-sleeved shirt with a deep neckline revealing his white shoulders and seductive collarbones, adorned with a necklace and silver bracelet.
An image that looked cool, mixed with allure, especially combined with the fact that Krittithee was holding the VIP card for this club, made many pairs of eyes turn to stare.
“Hello,” a woman said.
“Huh?” Krittithee responded.
Krittithee, who was heading straight for the second floor as Phawit had brought him before, had to turn around upon hearing a greeting from a beautiful, well-built young woman holding two glasses of drinks.
“First time here? Or meeting someone?” she asked. Even though she knew Krittithee was underage, the beautiful young woman seemed not to care because she moved closer, even smiling charmingly. Krittithee, who had never experienced anything like this, almost stepped back to escape.
Moreover, he felt the same feeling again: this place was not for him at all.
“Hitting on a young man, are you?” her friend said. Suddenly, that young woman’s friend stepped forward, then smiled sweetly.
“But someone this handsome is worth hitting on. Want to sit with us?” another woman asked. Another one grabbed Krittithee’s arm, pressing herself close, making Krittithee quickly decline.
“Sorry, I have an appointment,” Krittithee said.
“An appointment with who? Maybe we know them. We come here often,” one woman said. Hearing that, Krittithee, searching for another man, blurted out immediately.
“I’m here to see Phîi Seen,” Krittithee said.
Thud
With an uncertain tone, the two young women trying to pull Krittithee along to play with them froze, then quickly let go, shaking their heads as if they knew and saw nothing. They only pointed upstairs to a floor not everyone could access and one woman said, “If you want to see him, you have to get to that floor first.”
“And if I have this...” Krittithee immediately held up the card he had just gotten, making the onlookers widen their eyes and exchange glances.
“Sorry, we just remembered we have an appointment with friends. Let’s go,” they said.
The attitude of the two young women who hurried off in another direction left Krittithee frowning in confusion. A premonition was telling him that deciding to come here might not be a good idea. However, the pain of being hurt by another person pushed Krittithee to walk straight to the mezzanine staircase, showing the card to the staff, and asking for his goal today.
“I need to see Phîi Seen,” Krittithee said.
The pass that got Krittithee escorted to the higher floor, without knowing that getting in was much easier than getting out.
Meanwhile, another young man had just gotten out of a luxury car and used his own face as a pass to enter his Phîi’s time-killing business, also stopping to greet some staff he knew well.
Night had been brought here by his Phîi since it first opened. So, even though Nai was underage, just by showing his face, everyone knew this was the boss’s Nong. Moreover, many people felt more comfortable around Night because, even though both brothers were good-natured, everyone knew that Seen’s smile was much scarier than his blood-related sibling.
“Something to drink, Khun Night?” the bartender asked.
“Anything non-alcoholic. I brought some documents for Phîi Seen. I’ll be heading back soon; I have a quiz this Monday,” Night said, chatting familiarly with the bartender, even holding up an envelope of documents for the other to see.
“Not going up? Khun Seen is in today. He’s been here since early evening,” the bartender said.
“I won’t show my face in the dark like this; I’m afraid of interrupting,” Night said jokingly because he knew his half-brother’s habits well. He intended to finish his soft drink and leave immediately. However...
“Did you almost mess with Sirphop’s young man?” one woman asked. “How was I supposed to know that young man belonged to Khun Seen?” another replied.
The conversation happening behind made Night glance over, seeing two young women arguing.
“He looked dazed and confused, like it was his first time clubbing. Plus, so young. Who would think Khun Seen would be interested? Every other time, he’s only with beauties or at the level of that model,” one woman said.
“Speaking of models, I think I recognize him. Last time there was trouble in the club, I was there. Was it the young man who came with that model?” another asked.
Thud
Night froze instantly. The hand holding the drink unconsciously clenched. Without realizing it, he moved closer to the beautiful young women and asked rapidly,
“Excuse me, could I hear the details, please?” Night asked.
Please don’t let it be Graph. Please don’t let it be my classmate walking into a Venus flytrap, Nightthought.
***
Seen, or Sirphop, was the eldest son of a family that never fell off the list of the richest in Thailand, making everyone think he was a spoiled, coldly-aloof man who didn’t associate with those of lower status. But in reality, Sirphop was good-natured, smiled easily, got along well with capable people, was charming with both men and young women, and moreover...
Didn’t seem scary at all, Krittithee thought.
This was what Krittithee concluded as he looked at the owner of the luxurious club: a man wearing a light-colored casual shirt with sleeves rolled up to the elbows, top buttons undone, and dark jeans, sitting with his legs crossed on the desk, not caring that he had a guest. Meanwhile, in his hand were a few papers he had been reading.
“Alright, enough of this. I get dizzy seeing so many words,” Sirphop said. Only after finishing the last sheet did Sirphop place those few papers on the desk. He turned to look at tonight’s guest without taking his legs off the desk, only loosely clasping his hands on his chest, then smiled.
“So, what can I do for you, Nong?” Sirphop asked.
Krittithee was speechless. He just felt Sirphop’s smile seemed too friendly.
“Oh, no, I should ask first what your name is,” Sirphop said.
“I’m Graph,” Krittithee said.
“Uh-huh. And then...” Sirphop raised an eyebrow as if to tease, making Krittithee clench his fists, wanting to ask Phawit how someone like this could change him into someone Pakin would like.
“No sense of humor, huh?” Sirphop said. Seeing Krittithee clearly uncomfortable, Sirphop reluctantly put his feet down, raising his hands to shoulder level.
“Don’t make that face. I don’t bite. Come, sit here,” Sirphop said, pointing to the chair opposite. Krittithee hesitated slightly but stepped over to sit facing Sirphop, whom he had always wanted to meet, and admitted directly that he was mistaken.
I had thought this Phîi Seen would give a feeling similar to Pakin: scary, coldly-aloof, indifferent, and self-centered. But the man in front of me reminds me of Night. They really are brothers. Their annoying, teasing smiles are even alike, Krittithee thought.
The thought made Krittithee relax little by little, unconsciously.
“Alright, so what business does Nong Graph have with me? And did you tell Âi Pakin you came like this? I’m too lazy to have him chew my head off,” Sirphop said.
“It’s not about him!” Krittithee exclaimed. The moment Pakin’s name was mentioned, Krittithee spoke sharply, making Sirphop pause for a moment, turning to meet the round eyes that showed resentment, until he gave a slight smile, then nodded slowly.
“Okay, won’t mention him. But I still can’t figure out what business you have with me. If you say you just came to say hello, that doesn’t seem likely either,” Sirphop said. The large man leaned forward a bit. Even though he was still smiling broadly, the eyes staring deeply into Krittithee’s were full of cunning, which of course Krittithee couldn’t see.
“I wanted to meet you,” Krittithee said, accidentally letting his inner thoughts slip out, making Sirphop smile.
“Why?” Sirphop asked.
“Phawit said you could change me,” Krittithee replied.
Thud
“Oh, I remember now. You are the person Phawit brought last time when I wasn’t here, right? Hmm, this is getting interesting,” Sirphop said. The person Pakin said had a sharp nose for these kinds of things started piecing things together in his head. His smile widened further. His eyes sparkled as if something fun had just dropped right in front of him. He also rubbed his chin lightly, thinking.
“Yes, it’s me. I want to know what kind of person Pakin likes,” Krittithee said.
“I thought we agreed not to say that name?” Sirphop teased. But Sirphop still said it jokingly, making Krittithee clench his fists.
“Stop teasing me, Phîi! If you won’t tell me, I’m leaving!” Krittithee exclaimed. Krittithee thought only of coming to meet, talk, and understand Pakin from his close friend’s perspective. But he hadn’t thought any further, which was the complete opposite of Sirphop, because Sirphop slowly stood up.
Then Sirphop walked towards one wall. Krittithee almost blurted out, “Answer my question first!” However...
Click
Squeak
Just as Sirphop pressed a button on the wall, a door built to blend seamlessly with the wall swung open wide, revealing a large drinks bar, a soft, long sofa with a slim television screen in front showing the atmosphere inside the club, all on one screen. But more prominent than anything else was a bed.
A large bed placed against a clear glass wall that served as one side of the room, offering a view of the bright lights below.
“If we’re going to talk about this, it’ll take a while. Come on, let’s have a drink,” Sirphop said.
Krittithee hesitated for a moment, but Sirphop’s easygoing smile and friendly tone made Krittithee slowly stand up. He decided to step through the door into the room, even though his premonition was screaming warnings not to. However, the fact that Sirphop left the door open made Krittithee tell himself it was okay; if anything happened, he could escape. Besides, he absolutely would not go back unless he found out how to win over Pakin.
Krittithee was tired of being just a young man in Pakin’s eyes.
***
“Is Pakin playing salesman or something?” Phawit asked.
Meanwhile, Phawit was standing with his arms crossed in the doorway, watching his exceedingly capable cousin who could control so many people but didn’t know how to handle one young man. Pakin was sitting drinking quietly, but the atmosphere wasn’t as relaxed as the background music. On the contrary, Pakin, pretending to be relaxed, clearly had a tense expression.
Pakin didn’t answer the question, just continued sipping his drink. His eyes were on the iPad showing images of the latest race car lot that Payu had just finished tuning.
Phawit’s attitude made him roll his eyes.
“When you want him, you drag him here. When you want to shirk responsibility, you throw him away. Is this you, Khun Pakin?” Phawit asked.
“I don’t have time to talk to you. If you have nothing to do, go out and have fun,” Pakin said with a simple manner, contrary to the hand gripping the iPad tighter.
“Lazy,” Phawit replied simply as he walked over to sit on the opposite sofa, crossing his legs, his hands loosely clasped on his knees. His sharp, beautiful eyes stared steadily at Pakin.
“I just found out that someone like you rejects fresh goods, then turns to eat rotten ones,” Phawit said.
Pakin looked up to meet Phawit’s eyes. Phawit smiled slightly.
“I know rotten goods. They’ll stay rotten from day to night. Making them more rotten isn’t a problem. But you’re afraid that if you touch fresh goods the wrong way, they’ll spoil in a way you like, right? Honestly, do you like those who are pretentious and good at sucking up because you don’t want problems, or are you running from reality?” Phawit asked.
“If you weren’t my cousin, I’d have a gun to your head by now,” Pakin said, remaining calm, retorting in an even tone, which Phawit knew.
If Pakin was calm, no amount of provocation would work. Therefore, Phawit spoke in a serious voice.
“Let me tell you something, Pakin,” Phawit said, his beautiful sharp eyes staring into Pakin’s eyes.
“If you don’t want him, then let him go. Don’t give him hope, then destroy it over and over. Don’t claim it’s for safety, because you know perfectly well who is most dangerous to that young man,” Phawit said.
“What if I already let him go?” Pakin asked, freezing for a split second before smiling at Phawit, which almost made Phawit shake his head.
No, if I had really let him go, I wouldn’t have let Graph hang around me for over ten years. You’re just a selfish man, Phawit thought.
But before Phawit could say anything, Pakin’s phone rang, making him glance over at Panchai.
“What is it?” Pakin asked flatly.
“Khun Night contacted us. He says Khun Graph is at the club with Khun Seen,” Panchai reported.
“What did you say?!” Pakin exclaimed.
“Bloody fucking shit-lizard!” Pakin swore, making Phawit, who could guess something must have happened to Krittithee, smile coldly-aloof.
“You said yourself you let him go,” Phawit said.
Thud
Phawit’s words made Pakin sharply turn to look at his face. Both hands clenched into fists. Then Pakin spun around and strode away like a storm, also speaking into the phone to Panchai, who was still on the line.
“Get Âi Seen on the line! Tell him if he doesn’t stop, I’ll kill him!” Pakin said.
***
Krittithee started drinking alcohol at fifteen because he often sneaked out to drink with friends. Therefore, Krittithee was not a lightweight. He was confident he could drink and knew his own limits. So, when Sirphop handed him a glass of liquor, Krittithee didn’t hesitate to accept it, drinking it to not be impolite to Sirphop, then stared, wanting an answer.
“Where were we? Oh right, what kind of person does my friend like?” Sirphop asked jokingly, looking at Krittithee, who clearly showed he liked Pakin. But judging from Pakin’s attitude, it seemed he didn’t want this.
If he’s this attractive, I should take him in myself, Sirphop thought.
“If I had to compare, probably like Phawit,” Sirphop said.
Right, I should have known, Krittithee thought.
Krittithee turned his face away, thinking of Phawit, and the people Pakin was interested in: capable, brave, confident, good-looking, and you could tell they had been through a lot.
I don’t understand why he likes that type, but I’ve given myself the answer that it’s because they’re already experienced. No need to teach tiredly; once they get into bed, it’s probably hot and passionate, Krittithee thought.
The kind of person I can never become, no matter how hard I try, but want to be, Krittithee thought.
The more Krittithee thought, the more he downed the drink in his hand. Meanwhile, Sirphop was pleased because he moved to sit beside Krittithee. Sirphop’s large hand took the liberty of touching the smooth, white cheek of Krittithee, who had just recently come of age.
“Don’t touch,” Krittithee said.
“My friend likes capable people,” Sirphop said in a soft tone that made Krittithee’s anger subside. Sirphop’s large hand stroked the softness of Krittithee’s skin down to the tip of his chin and pushed it up gently. Then Sirphop’s lips lifted into a handsome smile.
“Âi Pakin likes people who are good at kissing,” Sirphop said. Sirphop’s fingertips moved to touch Krittithee’s lips lightly, stroking gently, making Krittithee shiver. His body heated up incredibly with Sirphop’s touch.
I don’t know why I’m yielding, Krittithee thought, but he didn’t push away when Sirphop’s large hand moved to his neck. Sirphop’s fingertips stroking lightly made Krittithee tremble all over. His breath began to heat up as Krittithee saw only one thing: Sirphop’s deep, intriguing eyes staring deeply into his.
Eyes that seemed to have the charm to draw people into a trap. Combined with Sirphop’s large palm stroking down to Krittithee’s waist, his body trembled slightly. Moreover, Krittithee’s body heated up just from a few words.
Snap
Then Sirphop’s large hand moved to Krittithee’s soft buttocks, slipping fingers into the groove of his pants, making Krittithee jump. Meanwhile, Sirphop’s sharp face leaned close to whisper in his ear.
“And good in bed,” Sirphop whispered.
“Want to be like that? Like Phawit? Like what Âi Pakin likes. I was the one who taught Phawit everything. His first kiss, his first time, his first happiness when our bodies joined. I taught everything. Want to be like that, don’t you?” Sirphop asked. Krittithee wanted to shake his head, wanted to refuse, but the face of Pakin, who had hurt him so severely, flashed into his mind. Pakin, who said he would never want Krittithee, who said Krittithee was no good, who said Krittithee would never be in his sight, who kicked Krittithee out of his life.
What else do I have to lose? Nothing. There’s nothing left to lose anymore, Krittithee thought.
“I know Âi Pakin well. I know what he likes. And I can make you into the person he likes,” Sirphop said.
“You can you really do it?” Krittithee asked.
Finally, Krittithee asked in a trembling, choked voice, looking at Sirphop, who was smiling and then leaned down.
I don’t know if it’s the atmosphere or the words that seem understanding that make me lie down flat on the soft sofa, my breath scorching hot as I look into his kindly smiling eyes, Krittithee thought.
Sirphop’s large hand moved inside Krittithee’s long-sleeved shirt, stroking his waist lightly. Just that made Krittithee almost gasp for air.
“I can do more than that,” Sirphop said. Sirphop’s deep voice seemed to come from afar as Krittithee’s back touched the sofa. Krittithee closed his eyes slowly as Sirphop’s warm lips pressed against his neck, creating a thrilling sensation that made his body tremble.
This is what I should do, should have done long ago, Krittithee thought.
“Phô said you were sick, so I was forced to come visit you,” Pakin had said.
Thud
But amidst his fading consciousness, Krittithee saw an image from the past flashing into his head: the image of a tall, handsome young man standing by the bed with a reluctant expression before throwing a large bag of snacks Krittithee was forbidden from eating onto his lap.
“And this, the one you kept complaining you wanted to try. Secretly good, huh? You’ll get scolded again later,” Pakin had said.
“Pakin, stay with me. You’re not allowed to go back until I fall asleep, okay? Okay? Okay? Okay?” Krittithee had pleaded.
“Bloody fucking shit-lizard, fine, fine. Go to sleep quickly, Âi-juvenile-hellspawn. Sleep fast. I want to hurry back and play games,” Pakin had replied.
For almost ten years, Krittithee’s childhood memories contained no images of his Phô, no images of his Mâe, but were full of images of Pakin, the person who complained of annoyance but visited Krittithee every time, the person who granted the requests of the much younger junior.
The image made tears about to flow from Krittithee’s tightly closed eyes.
“Let me go, Phîi. I want to go home,” Krittithee said.
Thud
At that very moment, Krittithee pushed away Sirphop nuzzling his neck, speaking seriously as he opened his eyes, making Sirphop freeze unexpectedly.
“I can’t sleep with anyone except Pakin,” Krittithee said.
Even though his body was burning hot, even though his body was screaming that it wanted until it couldn’t bear it, Krittithee spoke in a serious voice, staring into Sirphop’s eyes that showed displeasure.
Krittithee’s path, his choice, no matter how much it hurt, his destination had only one man named Pakin.
Sirphop’s words made him smile coldly-aloof.
“You know what, Graph? Deciding to step into this room means you won’t be able to leave easily,” Sirphop said.
Push
“If I want to leave, who can stop me? Whoa!” Krittithee exclaimed.
Krittithee tried to push Sirphop away and stand up. However, the moment his feet touched the floor, he felt the ground soften like pudding, forcing him to collapse back down. He had no strength to push away Sirphop, who followed and pinned him down, even managing to grab his hands and press them above his head.
“That liquor...” Krittithee said, gritting his teeth in frustration, making Sirphop laugh.
Krittithee tried to turn his face away. “Mmm, a special formula for VIP customers. But are you sure you don’t want to sleep with me?” Sirphop asked in an amused tone, but his sharp face bent down to press a kiss on Krittithee’s cheek and made as if to move towards his lips, which made Krittithee exclaim,
“Go die, Âi-despicable-person! Eek!” Krittithee shouted.
However, at that moment, Sirphop reached to grab Krittithee’s pants zipper, making Krittithee gasp and shudder.
No way, it’s impossible! How can I be this turned on? Krittithee thought.
Krittithee’s panicked expression made him look at Krittithee with satisfaction.
“I’ll help you feel more comfortable,” Sirphop whispered soothingly as he slowly, leisurely undid Krittithee’s pants, yet arousingly, which made Krittithee so frustrated he was about to cry.
Why do I have to experience this? No! I won’t sleep with anyone except Pakin! No! Krittithee thought.
Krittithee tried to gather strength to escape, at the moment when...
BANG!
“Sigh. Looks like playtime is over,” Sirphop said. Both heard a loud crash from the office door, making Sirphop sigh heavily. He looked into Krittithee’s eyes, who was shaking with fear because, right now, the one who should be afraid wasn’t Krittithee. It seemed Sirphop was the one who wouldn’t make it.
Snap
Whap!
At that very moment, Sirphop’s collar from behind was yanked back with full force, and a heavy fist slammed squarely into his cheek, sending Sirphop stumbling to sit on the floor. And as Sirphop looked up...
Click
The tip of a gun barrel was pressed against Sirphop’s forehead as Pakin’s icy voice rang out.
“Don’t mess with my person!” Pakin shouted.
Right now, Pakin was angrier than the anger he felt when he found out Sirphop had done something to his Nong.
Comments
Post a Comment