Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
~~~
The morning light filtered through heavy curtains into the spacious, elegantly decorated bedroom. Every piece of furniture and ornament was meticulously arranged to ensure comfort for the occupant. A single glance revealed it was a guest room.
At the center of the guest room stood a large bed, where the slender form of a young man in blue striped pajamas lay fast asleep.
Creak
At that moment, the bedroom door, sealed shut all night, slowly opened. The person who opened it stepped inside without hesitation and approached the bed directly.
“Hmm.” The intruder placed a hand on the forehead to compare the temperature with their own. The light touch caused the sleeping youth to stir slightly, pulling away. Then, both eyelids fluttered and slowly opened.
Slowly.
“Phîi...Pakin?”
Eyes...brimming with what seemed like concern. Graph called out softly, like someone not fully awake, believing he was still dreaming. Seeing the man he most longed to see leaning over the bedside, a large hand still resting on his forehead, and...
That gentle touch felt unbelievably comforting.
“Go back to sleep. Just checking if you’re close to dying or not.” Yet, the tone remained as flat as ever, snapping the drowsy youth back to reality.
Swat!
Thud
A muffled groan emerged from under the blanket. Thus, Krittithee instinctively swatted the other’s hand away, prompting the person checking on him to scowl in displeasure. Before the other could respond, Krittithee yanked the blanket over his head, concealing his face and hair entirely, and spoke.
“How did Phîi get in? This is my room!”
“This is my house!” When the defiant youth retorted stubbornly, Pakin countered with an equally irritated tone.
He had only come to check on him but was met with this infuriating juvenile-hellspawn first thing in the morning.
“Take the blanket down. I need to ensure you won’t die in my house.” The listener pressed his lips tightly, feeling the kindness from last night was merely a dream he’d foolishly hoped for. This morning, Phîi Pakin was unchanged—still annoyed, still speaking with irritation. The hands clutching the blanket trembled slightly more, yet he refused to reveal his just-woken face.
“Graph.”
“Graphic.”
“No need to bother with me. A fever won’t make me die in your house and burden Phîi!” Once the fever eased, his defiance surged, making the listener grit his teeth. Though Pakin could have turned and left the room, he knew he’d be irritated all day if he wasn’t certain the youth under his care was fine. Thus, the man who had vowed never to meddle with this youth...
Plop... Phîi...
“Hey!”
Then...a hand covered his face. A large hand seized the blanket’s edge and yanked it forcefully. Half the comforter dropped to the floor, and the young man on the bed yelped in shock, tilting his head up before his eyes widened.
“Phîi, get out! This is my room!” Krittithee shouted, flipping over to turn his back, trying to bury his face in the pillow because...he looked terrible.
He himself was the one who looked terrible compared to the man dressed for work.
Today, Phîi Pakin wore a full suit that made his tall frame appear even more commanding. His usually natural hair was styled upward in a strikingly handsome manner, the kind that once made Janjao squeal that he was as gorgeous as Lucifer incarnate. Standing so close, the deep, subtle scent of his cologne, laced with masculine allure, wafted over, letting the newly awakened youth inhale that captivating fragrance.
Everything about Phîi Pakin was impeccable. Compared to himself...this scruffy, unkempt Âi-juvenile-hellspawn was a mess. Just awake, teeth unbrushed. Graph had strived to dress well and look good since his teens, knowing Phîi Pakin admired beautiful things. He always gave his all before meeting him. But now...just...
“Listen clearly...this is my house.” As Pakin spoke heavily, eyeing the stubborn youth still hiding his face, he was running late and needed to confirm he was alright.
Plop
“Ouch! No, Phîi! Let me go!”
“Graphic! Don’t make me angry!” Thus, the young man seized his shoulder and yanked him onto his back. But the youth hadn’t lost his spirit, landing a small fist on Pakin’s shoulder, finally provoking the increasingly irritated man to roar.
The roar froze the recently feverish youth. His small heart sank to his feet. The hands pushing back dropped to his sides, letting the taller man successfully pin him on his back.
“That’s enough.” Pakin shook his head, gently touching the forehead, his other hand on his own.
“Still a bit warm...Eat and take your medicine today. If I return and learn you didn’t take it, there’ll be trouble...Understand, Graph?”
“...Understood.”
The man concerned only with whether the fever persisted fell silent. His sharp eyes narrowed slightly, seeing the usually argumentative youth stay quiet, avoiding eye contact. The moment he released the forehead, Graph nearly turned away, prompting Pakin to grab his wrist and pull him back.
Thud
The observer froze upon seeing the youth’s expression. Usually brash, this time it was...clearly nervous.
“What’s wrong?” He couldn’t resist asking softly.
“Phîi, let me go. I need to go to school.”
“At eight-thirty? School starts at seven-thirty, doesn’t it? You’ll be late now. Rest here.”
“Then when is Phîi going to work? Go already!” Graph shooed him, though he usually tried to keep him, making the listener frown sharply. But he noticed something...the youth’s demeanor, wiping saliva from his mouth and sleep from his eyes, alternating with smoothing his hair, lifted the corner of Pakin’s mouth slightly.
Swat
“Ouch! Why did Phîi hit me?”
“Annoying Âi-juvenile-hellspawn. No matter how much you smooth it, you won’t grow up.”
“I’m not a juvenile hellspawn! And I’m not a youth either!” Graph raised his voice, turning to meet his gaze, prompting the listener to raise an eyebrow and smirk.
“Your nose is running.”
Plop
“Hmph.” That single word made the listener cover his nose, causing Pakin to chuckle in his throat, making the youth’s face flush hotly.
“Phîi, just go wherever you’re going!” A muffled, angry voice rose, making Pakin laugh. He rose from the bed, eyeing the disheveled youth who, no matter how you saw him, was just a youth in his eyes. But before turning to leave the room...
“Phîi!” The young man called to stop him, making him turn back to meet his gaze.
“Will Phîi return today… Never mind, it’s nothing.” But before finishing, Graph shook his head, pulling the blanket over his head again, making the tall man pause briefly, realizing what this youth wanted.
“I’ll be back around seven-thirty. Wait to eat dinner together, and we’ll discuss this house’s rules.”
Pakin knew...those same lonely, forlorn eyes of the youth who once begged for his company.
It couldn’t be changed. Years later, those eyes remained...lonely, sad, isolated, with no one truly by his side. Though he’d tried to ignore them for years, seeing them clearly, he sighed and promised.
Not that he was softening because they had to discuss living together anyway.
Pakin told himself this. All day, his irritated mood could shift to amused laughter recalling...the flushed face of that Âi-juvenile-hellspawn fearing he didn’t look handsome in his eyes.
***
“‘Youth’ this, ‘youth’ that. Hah, I’m just a clown in Phîi Pakin’s eyes!” After the house’s master left, the (temporary) room’s owner punched and kicked the soft pillow to vent. From styling his hair, it became messy again. But with Phîi Pakin gone, he didn’t need to be handsome, right?
“Hmph, coming back to eat dinner together. Thinks I’ll be happy or what?” The stubborn youth muttered, though...he was happy...very happy indeed.
How long since he last ate with Phîi Pakin? So long...so long he couldn’t recall.
Though Phîi Pakin had business at his house often, though the youth pestered him many times, never once had he been invited to eat. He was only pushed to go home quickly. So, forget eating together, just seeing his face seemed to ruin his appetite.
Plop
“He’s coming back to eat together.” Yet, the youth who yesterday thought of giving up collapsed onto the bed, hugging the pillow, his tangled face, like swatting mosquitoes, slowly breaking into a wider smile until he buried it in the pillow.
“How should I act?...Ah, Janjao!” Thinking this, Krittithee recalled he’d forgotten his close friend, quickly searching for his phone by the bed. But...the battery was dead.
No wonder. Usually, if he didn’t call, Janjao would message late at night.
So, the young man found a charger to call the one person he could share his heart with.
Not just about how to act tonight, but also yesterday’s events.
[Graph! Hello, hello, hello! Oh, thank goodness. Graph, are you okay?...Hey, hold on.]
“Hmm.” The youth was puzzled. As his close friend answered, she spoke rapidly in a whisper. Then, a voice came through the phone.
[Teacher, may I go to the bathroom? My period came!]
The youth couldn’t help laughing, forgetting it was class time. His friend was bolder than most girls, not whispering to the teacher but blurting it out and likely running off. A thought right on target.
[Graph, Graph, are you still there? Okay, I can talk now. I’ve locked myself in the bathroom.]
“Hahaha, going that far?”
[Don’t laugh! I was worried sick. Couldn’t reach you yesterday, didn’t know if you were dead or alive. I was so stressed I barely slept, even though Phîi’s Sun's friend said you were fine.]
“Phîi’s friend?” Graph tripped over these words, but as she continued with concern, he explained.
“I’m safe now. Phîi Pakin came just in time. Thought I was going to die...” Then, the story poured out like a flood, recounting everything from Pakin saving him, the comforting embrace, to where he was now, something his friend would never guess.
[What? Graph is at Phîi Pakin’s house now!]
That was it. The nearly frantic worrier nearly shrieked into the phone, her tone brimming with excitement.
[Oh my! At first, I was going to shun him! So dangerous, dragging Graph into it. But hearing this, it’s so cool! Total hero! Plus, he took Graph into his house fearing danger. That’s it, that’s it! Oh, I’m thrilled!] The young woman rattled off like a machine gun, making Graph protest, though he couldn’t stop smiling.
“Phîi Pakin hasn’t said a word about fearing danger...but he’s coming to eat and talk tonight...”
[Eat together!]
“Ouch, quieter! My eardrums will burst.” Krittithee pulled the phone from his ear as his friend screamed, but she seemed unfazed.
[Graph, this is perfect! You know men fall for homemade food!]
Graph frowned, sensing trouble brewing. And he was right, as she spoke firmly.
[Graph, ever heard that the charm of a ladle’s end can capture a man’s heart?]
“Hey, we’re not...”
[Graph, Graph, listen well. We don’t have much time since you know how tough the teacher is...This is about my Phîi’s friend. My Phîi cooks really, really well! So well! And that food made his romantic partner smitten, couldn’t go anywhere without him. Heard when he went abroad for work, he came back craving my Phîi’s cooking. So, Graph, get in the kitchen today!] “Wait...”
[No waiting, Graph! No time to teach you. Look up easy recipes online. I have to go to class. Oh, don’t forget, this plan is...Concerning the Charm of a Ladle’s End...Use the ladle to capture Phîi Pakin’s heart!]
“Hey, Janjao!” Graph shouted loudly, but it was too late; she spoke rapidly and hung up. Calling back, she was unavailable, soon messaging...Teacher’s watching, can’t play.
A brief message, like abandoning her friend in the ocean.
“Cooking...really?” The young man repeated to his phone, then shook his head.
“No way. Me?”
Someone like Âi Graph cooking… I never even held a frying pan.
“...and that food made his romantic partner smitten, couldn’t go anywhere without him...”
Yet, that bloody fucking sentence echoed in his head, swirling until Graph gritted his teeth.
“I’ll catch Janjao and wring her neck someday!” But before her neck, he’d wring his own for listening...and going along every time.
When his close friend spoke so, determined to try, Graphic scoured online recipes and chose...pad kra pao.
Yeah, that homey dish for any meal.
The young man grimaced, as every recipe seemed too complex.
“Just try. If it fails, toss it.” Graph told himself, fueled by the few words of the man who promised to dine together.
For Krittithee, it had been ages since dining with both parents. Even when they ate together, it felt like separate worlds. His parents discussed things he didn’t grasp, ignoring his words, until he grew numb, no longer expecting family meals. But now Graph hoped...hoped dearly to dine with Phîi Pakin.
The thought alone thrilled him to near madness.
It sparked dreams… dreams of Phîi Pakin praising its deliciousness.
He wanted one good trait in Phîi Pakin’s eyes.
***
Sizzle! Splatter!
“Ouch! Damned shit-lizard!”
But cooking wasn’t as simple as thought, especially for one always served. Even after scoping out and borrowing the workers’ kitchen, preparing ingredients per the internet, lighting the stove, and pouring oil, leftover water in the pan splattered, making him jump back, retreating barely in time.
“The heat’s too high, Khrap.” A worker rushed to turn off the gas, as the kitchen borrower dared not approach the pan.
“The oil’s all burnt.” Graph pursed his lips, feeling the unspoken criticism despite no one scolding him.
“Let me try again!”
Graph scooped out the oil, tossed it, and poured new oil. No splatter this time, so he added pork. But...
Splatter! Splatter!
“Ouch!” Water in the pork splashed him, making him yell, scramble back, and shake his hand until the spatula clattered to the floor.
“Um...Khun Graph, you’re making pad kra pao, right? Put garlic and chilies first, Khrap.”
“Huh? Can I add them later?”
“For fragrance, they go first, Khrap.” The worker called out, leaving Graph stumped, cursing more as the pork burned. His attitude made the young women in the kitchen exchange worried glances.
“Will he manage, Pa Kaew?” They whispered to the head cook prepping vegetables, making the elderly woman, watching from the start, smile faintly.
“Manage or not, he’s a guest. Dare tell him to stop?” At that, all fell silent. When they tried to help, the young man insisted firmly.
“I’ll do it myself. If someone helps, it’s not my work! It’s just pad kra pao, why can’t I do it!”
Graph declared, his competitive streak returning. Though he nearly set a towel ablaze twice, dropped the basil basket one and a half times, cut his fingers four times chopping pork, and accidentally sliced the fish sauce bottle, pouring in several spoonfuls.
All this made the household workers gape in horror at his...destructive culinary skills.
“Pa Kaew, time for dinner prep. Herb-roasted chicken today, right?” A young assistant whispered to the head cook, time wasted guarding the guest, now sweating profusely, his fair skin, unused to hard work, flushed red. Despite ruining, burning, and spilling dishes, he was determined to succeed.
A stubbornness everyone began to resent, but couldn’t voice, as he troubled the kitchen.
“Hmm, did I say that?” The head cook replied, checking supplies.
“The whole chicken was cut for Khun Graph’s pad kra pao. We’re out of pork, you see.”
“Then what...” The assistant’s face turned horrified, making the kitchen head laugh.
“Hmm, we’ll have to serve Khun Graph’s pad kra pao to Khun Pakin then.” The reply made everyone’s faces blanch, fearing dismissal, unlike the head cook watching the small figure doggedly continuing, despite swollen, blistered hands.
“Phîi Pakin! Phîi Pakin must play with me! Come play with me!”
The image of a little one overlapped, making the old woman, who’d seen the little one chase the house’s young man for years, smile faintly. Years later, Khun Graph still clung to the young man. And...this resolve was truly admirable.
The same youth chasing the same man for over a decade.
***
“Who made this!”
Pakin scowled from seeing the simple dishes: pad kra pao chicken, overly dark; stir-fried vegetables, oddly surprising; and clear soup, like dishwater. He said nothing at first, not being picky about food. But one bite of pad kra pao...he nearly swore.
Did you use salt instead of sugar? Bloody fucking salty.
So, he asked sternly, irritation flaring, not noticing the tablemate bowing nearly into his rice. He turned sharply to the flustered workers, none daring to name the maker of this kidney-wrecking dish, making Pakin frown, taste the vegetables, scowl, and try the soup.
Clang!
“Are you mocking me?”
The tall man asked coldly, tossing his spoon onto his plate, sweeping his gaze over the bowing workers, not daring to speak under his angry eyes.
He’d worked all day. Couldn’t he have edible food?
Though Pakin was strict with subordinates, he rarely criticized household matters, as the old head cook managed them. But this was too much, like making the master a clown, warranting a lesson.
“Where’s Pa Kaew?”
“Here, Khun Pakin.”
Snap
When he called for the head cook, she stepped forward with a faint smile, prompting Pakin to ask sternly.
“What’s this food? Who made it?” His tone softened slightly for the long-serving woman, but his fierce eyes still glinted, making her ask back with a smile.
“How’s the taste, Khrap?”
“Are you mocking me...This food, toss it to a dog, it wouldn’t eat! Who could swallow this saltiness? This soup’s like dishwater.” Pakin spoke bluntly, wiping her smile. She glanced at the person bowing across the table, making Pakin turn too.
Today, this stubborn youth was oddly quiet. Since returning, they’d barely locked eyes.
“Graph, I’ll take you out to eat. Get ready.” Too lazy to press the workers with this youth here, he spoke flatly, planning to start the car. But...
“Is it so bad even a dog wouldn’t eat it, Phîi?”
Thud
“What did you say...”
“I asked if it’s so bad Phîi can’t eat it!”
Crash!
As Pakin repeated the question, Graph shot up, chair crashing backward. He lifted his head, shouted, revealing a face...on the verge of tears.
Holding back tears until his nose reddened, Graph made Pakin frown sharply.
“What’s this madness now...”
“Yeah, I’m mad! Utterly mad for making this damned shit-lizard food for Khun Pakin to eat! I’m mad for stubbornly serving this! And I’m mad for giving Phîi dog food!” The defiant youth yelled, pointing at the table’s food, making Pakin narrow his eyes.
“You made this?” Pakin asked, incredulous.
That made Graph wipe tears, crushed since the dog food remark.
Plop
“I’ll throw it away!” Graph grabbed the vegetable and soup plates swiftly, revealing something to the observer.
Two hands covered in bandages.
“What’s going on? Who let Graph in the kitchen!” Pakin turned to the head cook in a low voice, prompting a quick reply.
“Khun Graph asked to use the kitchen this afternoon and has been trying to cook since. The kitchen ran out of supplies, so I couldn’t make anything else for Khun Pakin, Khrap.” Her words implied she allowed this food on the table, making Pakin roll his eyes.
“Do you think I wouldn’t act against you?” He knew the kitchen running out was impossible. With several cars, a few orders would bring fresh ingredients to the door.
“No, Khrap. If this error gets me fired by Khun Pakin, so be it. But I couldn’t waste the food. Especially since Khun Graph worked hours on it.” Pakin stared steadily, then smirked wryly.
“You knew I’d never fire you for such a childish reason...You’re siding with that youth, aren’t you?” Pakin laughed lowly, eyes not smiling, as it seemed the head cook had taken the stubborn youth’s side.
“Khun Graph never handled such things, but his hands are full of wounds. Oil splashed his neck. He sweated profusely, enduring the stuffy kitchen Khun Pakin wouldn’t enter for four or five hours...This old woman couldn’t discard the food, Khrap.” Her words revealed the stubborn youth’s effort.
Did they really think Pakin would soften?
Then, the youth with red face, nose, and eyes, as if he’d cried once, returned, grabbing the pad kra pao plate to throw away, avoiding eye contact from shame and self-pity. But...
Plop
The man who claimed not to soften grabbed his wrist, and yanked him back. “Planning to hurt yourself daily until your Phô tears my chest open?” Pakin growled, examining the hand, red with blisters from the heavy pan and cuts, while Graph struggled.
“It’s not Phîi’s business!” The tearful, upset youth shouted, but Pakin held firm, placing the pad kra pao back on the table.
“Business or not, you’re my responsibility now...Sit and eat!” The tall man commanded.
“Will Phîi eat dog food?” The stubborn youth, still defiant, flung Pakin’s harsh words back. But he struggled to hold back tears, making Pakin roll his eyes.
He hadn’t imagined Graph enduring hours in the kitchen...“Is there any human food left? You ruined all the supplies, didn’t you? Sit and eat already!” Pakin threw Graph’s words back, pushing him to sit, then sat, pulling his rice closer, starting the worst meal he’d ever had.
Amid...everyone’s stunned gazes.
Khun Pakin is eating it?
“Phîi, it’s not delicious. It’s inedible...”
“Do you want me to eat or not?” Pakin cut in, annoyed with the debate, silencing Graph. He sat, wringing his hands, watching Phîi Pakin eat, disbelieving his eyes.
Phîi Pakin...is eating it.
Graph turned to the head cook, who ignored kitchen objections and served his hellish cooking, receiving a faint smile back.
“Don’t smile. I haven’t settled with you...If you don’t want firing, I want a fried egg, sunny-side up.” Without looking, Pakin spoke flatly, making the old woman accept and hurry off, expecting this outcome.
Ultimately, the grown young man who planned to visit a friend softened for the adorable, stubborn youth.
An old memory that made the old woman smile.
While that stubborn little one from years ago ate his rice with pad kra pao and...tears.
Not from being scolded, but from joy that he...was shown kindness...even a little was enough.
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