Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
~~~
Oat had been sitting looking at his phone for quite a while now. Since the day he sent a message to Shin asking him to come out and eat together, not only had the other party not replied, he had gone completely silent. Whatever he sent, there was no reply, no read receipts. And even when he called, he was told he was busy, had errands, until he began to find it strange.
The former Head wáak didn't want to be suspicious, didn't want to think-deeply. But he couldn't help thinking of that youth, Focus.
No, Shin isn't that kind of person. If Shin says he won't be unfaithful, then he won't be unfaithful. He believed, you know, that Shin truly meant what he said. And he didn't have even a shred of thought of doing such a thing. Being with Dear that day, he truly saw Dear as a Nông, nothing more than that. Therefore, Oat didn't suddenly think about what his own actions might have made the other party think otherwise.
“Peculiar.” Yes. Since dating Shin for two or three months now, even though they talked little, went anywhere together maybe once a week or once every two weeks, one thing that had never been missing... was the matter of the bed.
Shin liked to say he couldn't go without sex. Acted as if it was the main course for the body. When he didn't get it, he'd be bored, fed up, irritated. But actually, he said it wasn't like that. Shin wasn't addicted to sex. Because if Shin was addicted, he would be too. Sex was an excuse for the two of them to be together.
Therefore, the whole week Shin hadn't come, he was starting to get a bit irritated too.
“Sun, have you seen Shin?”
“Why should I tell you, Phîi?” So, when he passed by Sun, he went straight to ask without hesitation. And that made the Faculty Moon, who was with a second-year youth, turn to look, then shrug.
The demeanor made the onlooker even more irritated. He knew this youth didn't like his face since the time he liked Dear. But now there was no reason to act like this towards him, until he sneered.
“Have you forgotten that I am a senior? During cheerleading, didn't I teach you how to respect seniors?!”
Thud.
“Âi'!!!”
“Âi'Sun, stop it, Ná!” The end of the extremely stern voice that played the role of Phîi wáak, Oat, made Sun freeze thud, before his eyes intensified, making a move as if to lunge forward, if not because Ryu grabbed his arm and hurriedly raised his hand in a wai to the senior.
“I apologize on behalf of Âi'Sun, Khráp, Phîi Oat. It's irritated. You, Phîi, were asking for Âi'Shin, right? Just now, I heard him tell Âi'Sun he was going home. Someone is waiting for him.” Ryu hurriedly spoke to tell immediately, while holding his nuisance romantic partner's arm tightly. He saw him being in a good mood about everything all the time, but why did he act so hateful towards Phîi Oat?
Having gotten the answer he wanted, Oat said thank you, then turned to go the other way, before Ryu turned snap to look at his youthful romantic partner.
“What the hell are you (Mueng)? Why act like that towards Phîi Oat?”
“Is Phîi Ryu asking about me?”
"Yeah!"
“Not taking your (Mueng) romantic partner's side!”
“Well, you (Mueng) are the one in the wrong here. Don't make pitiful eyes. I (Kuu) won't soften, damn it!” Ryu retorted immediately, when the annoying fucker made a pitiful face, and also spoke in a hurt voice that his Miia didn't take his side. And that made the listener just turn away, indicating... I'm sulking, you know.
The demeanor made the onlooker not think of appeasing him, because he just lifted a sinister smile.
“Yeah, go sulk. Tonight, no need to come sleep in my (Kuu) room.”
“Why like that?!” Âi'Sun even complained, then hurriedly followed behind, even though he had plenty of reasons to dislike that Âi'Phîi Oat's face. Before, he came in as the third party between Âi'Dear and Phîi Porsche. Now he made Âi'Shin-jang seem like he was transforming into a grass-fire more and more. Like this, how could he not detest his face?
Oat had been to Shin's house only three times. The first time was the day he took him to the racetrack and brought him back. The second time was when he stopped by to pick up the car, then went out with him. And this time was the third time he came to his house.
The young man turned off his beloved minibike, looked through the gate and could see its BMW parked still in the carport, until he hesitated just a bit.
That second-year youth said Shin came back for an errand. And what if it was an important errand? Would pressing the bell be good?
The person who didn't think too much but came straight to find the half-Thai youth sighed. At the moment someone walked across from the side garden, and then he saw the shadow of the person standing in front of the fence.
“Who are you looking for, Khâa?” A sweet voice spoke up, making Oat startle a little, before standing on tiptoe to look through the fence and see a middle-aged woman, small-framed, owner of fair skin, and also with a smile that made one feel at ease. The person he had seen from the framed photo on the wall when he came to this house... Shin's Mâe.
“Hello, Khráp. I came to see Shin. Is he here, Khráp?” Even though he saw the car, he asked to be sure, making the sweet-mannered woman in front of him smile.
“He is, Ná. A friend of Shin-ji, Chá? Not Sun or Dear, right? Mâe has seen pictures of those two.” The name the other party called made the listener frown slightly. He only learned just now that the name Shin didn't come from just Shin... Shin-ji.
“Uh, yes, Khráp. My's name is Oat, Khráp.” However, Oat didn't mention it, besides raising his hand in a wai and introducing himself, making the other party have a slightly troubled expression.
“Right now Shin-ji has a guest, Ná, Chá. Wait a moment. Mâe will go tell him.” Oat didn't find it strange why the other party had to go ask first. After all, he was a large young man wearing a shop shirt, and riding a big motorcycle. However he looked, he didn't seem trustworthy at all. But before the lady of the house could go call her son, the person being talked about appeared from the house door. However, he didn't come out alone.
And the person who followed him out was someone Oat remembered well... Focus.
Standing at this spot, he couldn't hear what those two were talking about. But the smiling demeanor of that youth, and also holding Shin's arm, made him irritated indescribably. The two talked in front of the house for a while, before Oat had to clench his fist tightly.
“Focus loves Phîi Shin the most!” The voice shouting a declaration of love resounded through the house. Moreover, that youth jumped to hug Shin tightly, in a way that he only saw Shin hug back, then pat that youth's head lightly.
The image made him feel anger like he had never been angry before.
“Shin-ji.” The demeanor of the two men made the person who was the Mâe call out, making her son turn to look. But from that spot, Shin couldn't see who his Mâe was talking to, until he had to let go of Focus and walk over.
“Máa, I will take this youth to send him off. And who is that...”
Thud.
But then, just as Shin stepped forward, the tall form froze. His eyes stared at the person standing outside the fence, before asking in a strong voice.
“Phîi Oat, how did you get here, Phîi?!”
“信二、この人は友達なの? (Shin-ji, kono hito wa tomodachi na no? - Shin-ji, is this person a friend?)” The demeanor made the Mâe ask her son in Japanese, making Shin reply quickly in a rapid stream, before pressing to open the gate. And just as the gate opened, Oat rushed in.
Pat.
“We have something to talk about!” The person who was the senior grabbed Shin's arm tightly, and also suppressed the anger that was about to explode at any second. There was an older person here too. Moreover, Focus was still standing making a startled face not far away. But the other party didn't cooperate at all, because he removed his hand and said in a flat voice.
“But I don't. I have to send off Focus.” The words made Oat look at the other party with disappointed eyes. Before he knew it, these words had escaped his mouth.
“Where did you (Khun) say you (Khun) wouldn't be unfaithful, huh?”
Thud.
Slap!!!
Just as he finished speaking, a heavy fist struck full force on his cheek, making the person who couldn't brace himself in time fall to the ground in a heap, amid the startled cries of both Shin's Mâe and Focus, who widened their eyes, looking at the half-Thai young man who merely shook his hand to dispel a bit of the pain, before shouting out loudly.
“You (Mueng) have no right to say that word!”
Snap.
Oat swung his gaze back immediately, and also moved his jaw back and forth, feeling the metallic taste of blood in his mouth. Then he just smiled bitterly, heavily, while controlling the anger that was surging up more and more.
“I have the right as Khun's romantic partner! Where did you, Khun, put your romantic partner when you, Khun, were with your (Khun) own ex? Huh!!!”
“Fa... romantic partner. This person is Phîi Shin's romantic partner?” Focus widened his eyes, looking at the large-framed young man who by no means looked like the type Phîi Shin liked. The person whose eyes were gleaming until it was scary, and who also made a face as if he wanted to lunge forward and punch Shin. However he looked, it seemed more like adversaries than romantic partners.
However, this voice didn't make the pair turn to pay attention, because the two men were still staring at each other silently. And it was Focus who hurriedly stepped forward, understanding now that he himself was the cause of Phîi Shin's romantic partner misunderstanding.
“Phîi, Khráp. I didn't...”
“Shut up, Focus!!!”
Thud.
However, Shin shouted loudly instead, making the person who was about to say something startle violently, and also fall silent. Then Shin said in a strong voice.
“You can get out of my (Kuu) house now.”
“No! Not until we talk this through! Khun, you said yourself there would be no infidelity, and then you (Khun) swallow your (Khun) own words! Why? Do you (Khun) want me to be the last to know that you (Khun) made up with that youth? Want me to be the dim-wit who gets cuckolded, is that it?!” Oat said in a harsh voice, his other hand still holding his own jaw, controlling the feeling that wanted to retaliate. He had completely forgotten that now there was an older person present. And that made Shin just smile bitterly.
“Are you (Mueng) talking about yourself? How was it? Was Âi'Dear's taste as you wanted?”
Bam!!!
Oat couldn't control himself and retaliated with a punch full force on the speaker's face, making Shin's head turn. However, the person himself quickly shook his head back and just smiled bitterly.
“Can't accept it when I speak the truth, Khráp?”
“Don't talk about Dear like that! Dear isn't that kind of person!”
“Did I (Kuu) curse Âi'Dear a single word? I (Kuu) am cursing you (Mueng), asking if it was delicious. Interfering with someone who has an owner when the owner isn't around. Satisfied now, are you? How was it? Going in when Âi'Dear was crying. Does it know yet that Phîi wants to fuck its ass until it's wrecked?!”
“Chonnon!!!” Oat shouted resoundingly, and also made a move as if to lunge forward again. And that made Shin get into a defensive stance. The sharp pair of eyes gleamed intensely. The demeanor made the person who was his Mâe exclaim in surprise.
Swoosh.
The middle-aged woman stepped in between the two of them, then raised her hands to block between the two young men. The demeanor of the person who should have been shocked to the point of fainting that her son was punched was calmer than average. Moreover, her kind face still gave a comforting smile to the person who punched her son, then said in a pleading voice.
“Is Oat, right, my child? Mâe asks, please, don't have a quarrel more than this. Shin is angry now. And when he's angry, he won't spare anyone's face... Can you calm down a bit more and then come talk?” Flawless Thai came out of her mouth. But that made Shin grab his Mâe's shoulder to push her out, while firing Japanese at her.
“Shin-ji... Go inside. Right now you're letting emotions override reason.”
“くそ! さけんな! (Kuso! Saken na!)” Shin swore in a way that made the person who was his Mâe frown slightly, but she turned to the person who seemed easier to talk to.
“Oat, can you go back first, my child? Consider it as Mâe asking, please. Then whatever it is, talk when you've cooled down more than this. You're romantic partners, aren't you? Just putting emotions on each other, it's only loss and loss.” The person who was the Mâe didn't show any sign of surprise at all that her son had a romantic partner who was a man. She also spoke in an understanding tone, making Oat clench his fist tightly. His eyes were still locked with Shin's eyes, both smoldering with equal anger.
However, Nǎai Oat still had enough consideration for the older person to raise his hand in a wai, then turn and leave the house, even though he wanted to talk things through. In a way that Shin also made a hee sound in his throat.
Snap.
After that, the red-headed young man turned and entered the house without saying a single word to anyone, making Focus only stand dazed, until the lady of the house, who had known all along that this youth was her son's romantic partner and that they had broken up, raised her hand to touch his shoulder.
“Mâe will go send you off instead of Shin.” Even though she was worried about her son, she had always known that Shin could handle everything himself. It wasn't that she was neglectful. But Shin-ji was like this. If someone crossed the line he set, he would never say anything again. The person who could force him to speak what was in his heart was probably only his cousin.
Maybe it was her fault for sending him to live in Japan when he was young. His turning point happened to be raised by her Phôo. No wonder he became such a hard-to-understand person.
Bang!
At the same time, Shin stepped into his room fast as a storm, then slammed the door shut with a loud thud.
Crash!
Then swung his fist into the wall of the room, before burying his face against that hand, suppressing his own angry emotions. After a good while, the red-headed young man lifted his head, then gave a pitiful smile at himself.
“There's no way that people who hurt together and then date can survive, can they?”
He already knew that people who had their hearts broken similarly meeting each other would only cause hurt in the same spot again. There was no one who could help heal. But he also thought it would survive. He wanted someone stable with feelings. Phîi Oat was like that. But he forgot. Because he was too stable, the other party couldn't forget the old person.
“It must be my (Kuu) fault for falling in love with someone like Phîi... Looks like I (Kuu) will have this despicable kind of love for life.”
The first time it hurt, it was enough to make his heart badly bruised. But this time it hurt, Shin felt as if he would never be able to love anyone again.
His heart was hurt repeatedly when he saw how much Phîi Oat still loved Âi'Dear.
Âi'Dear isn't wrong. Phîi Oat isn't wrong. I (Kuu) alone am the one who stubbornly persisted even though I (Kuu) knew how difficult it was.
“It's time to clear up everything, isn't it?”
He had to be the one to go clear up everything like with Focus again. Hurt his own heart again before the feelings dragged on longer than this. Before this heart sank so deep that he became a dim-wit who gave in to all love... I (Kuu) will not agree to be that pitiful person.
***
Oat was both angry and irritated, and also wanted to storm into that half-Thai youth's house again. However, the older person's words were correct. If they just put emotions on each other, everything would only be loss and loss. Moreover, now he was starting to feel guilty... How could he have punched him? How could he have punched his own romantic partner? No matter how angry he was.
The young man raised his hand to hold his bruised cheek tightly, while thinking how much Shin must have hurt from his punch.
“What have I (Kuu) done?!!!” Two hands rubbed his head hard.
Bang bang bang.
But then, the sound of rapid knocking on the door made him jump up immediately. The tall form rushed out immediately, hoping to meet only one person.
“Shin!!!” Yes. The person standing in front of the room was the red-headed junior who was standing there with a blank face, until he had to pull him into the room. And Oat had to frown and tense up when he saw the bruise on his cheek... Because Shin's skin was white, the bruise appeared clearly until he had to reach out to touch it.
“I am sorry.” The touch that Shin himself didn't avoid made the person's heart warm up a bit more, until he pressed his palm against it, making Shin lift the corner of his mouth in a smile, even though his eyes... weren't laughing at all.
“Your (Phîi) face doesn't look bland either.” Shin said while lightly touching the bruise at the corner of his mouth, before being the one to pull his hand back, and also turning his face away from the person touching him.
“I came to clear things up.”
Thud.
The listener froze for a bit, before agreeing to follow the other party into the room. He looked at the person who was standing with his arms crossed, hips leaning against the TV table, silently. And just seeing his face, the image from the afternoon flashed back... the image of him and that youth.
“You, Khun, didn't get back together with Focus, did you?” As soon as the other party said he would clear things up, Oat blurted out the question immediately. He didn't want to be suspicious about this matter anymore. And that made Shin raise his eyebrows a little, before shaking his head. However, it wasn't a denial, but...
“Don't misunderstand. I didn't come to clear my own innocence. I came to clear our status.”
The matter of him helping Focus with something didn't need to be told for the other party to know, since the most important thing was that Phîi Oat still hadn't forgotten Âi'Dear.
No, no. If one heart has already fallen in love, but the other still loves someone else, stubbornly persisting will only cause mutual hurt.
Shin wasn't a fickle person. He wasn't someone who believed things easily. He had been observing the matter of Âi'Dear all along. Even though he thought he could wait for Phîi Oat, in reality, every time he saw Phîi Oat with his friend, the memory of his previous love would always come back to hurt. In the end, Phîi Oat would be like Focus, who didn't choose someone like him. Therefore...
“Let's end it, Phîi. It's not working anymore.”
At this time, Oat could only stand frozen in place. His mind was dazed as if someone had hit him with a sledgehammer. His eyes widened at what he heard. Even his voice was cut off as if he forgot how to speak. Did he misunderstand something? Was Shin saying... let's break up?
“This is...”
“As we agreed, there would be no infidelity while dating. But if we break up, then each party has no rights anymore.” Shin continued as if he didn't feel anything. And that made the listener ask, at a loss for what to do.
“Why!?” Shin merely met the eyes of the person in front of him, before smiling.
“You (Phîi) will be able to do whatever you (Phîi) want. And I will also be able to do whatever I want.”
Pat.
“Are you (Khun) going to get back together with that youth?!!!!” The words ended. Oat came in and grabbed the other's shoulder tightly, before shouting loudly, which didn't make the listener flinch, because he only answered...
“It's not your (Phîi) business anymore.”
No. You (Phîi) yourself will be able to turn and comfort Âi'Dear to your (Phîi) heart's content. Who knows, maybe there will be a chance for it to turn and look at you (Phîi).
The thought made him smile, about the same as Oat, who let go of his shoulder weakly.
“What if I don't break up?”
“Don't be cowardly, Ná, Phîi Oat. We agreed from the beginning. If we want to break up, tell each other directly. Everything ends. And I want everything to end here. Right now.” Shin said frankly. It felt as if the situation was repeating the day he broke up with Focus. But this hurt a lot more. Anyway, Phîi Oat was the first man, and probably the only one he had opened his legs for.
The serious demeanor, and also the expression that said he was serious, made the onlooker feel as if he had lost strength, his legs weak until he was about to fall to the ground in a heap. But what kept him standing was probably because he was in shock and couldn't move.
It was clear enough. Shin was going to go back to the suitable person. And that made Oat only pity himself.
He loved Shin on the day Shin didn't love him anymore.
“That's right... we agreed.”
If we don't love each other, then why hold on?
At this moment, Oat hated this trait of his own. Why did he have to see the happiness of the person he loved before himself? Why did he have to give in just because Shin said he would go back to his ex? Even though in his heart, he wanted to throw a tantrum, wanted to hold on, wanted to hug Shin tightly and beg pitifully that... please, don't leave each other, don't break up, don't leave me anywhere.
However, everything he was thinking got stuck in his throat. The determined look in Shin's eyes now was like when he said he would make him love him. But this time, Shin was determined to make our matter end. And as if that answer made Shin move closer, before giving a smile.
“We've broken up. It's time for me to take back what I lost.”
“What you (Khun) lost?” Oat suppressed the sorrow in his chest, asking softly.
“I said I wouldn't agree to be on the bottom forever. And since our matter is over, I want to try being on top for the first and last time... This way it's fairer than you (Phîi) getting to take me exclusively, right?”
The words made Oat stare at the other's eyes silently, before laughing at himself.
“In the end, all we have is sex, isn't it?”
“It's been like that from the beginning.” The red-headed young man said flatly. And that made the person who had been refusing all along turn towards the bedroom, raise one hand to sweep back his hair, then speak in a voice trying to suppress its trembling.
“That's right. I shouldn't be the only one who gets taken, Ná.” Even though he had never thought of agreeing, at this time, Oat agreed to everything if it would keep this youth with him even a minute longer. Even though his heart... hurt so much he wanted to die.
The demeanor made Shin merely step into the bedroom he was familiar with, look at the person he loved taking off his shirt hastily, followed by his pants, in a way that he followed suit. Everything was without conversation. There was only the sound of clothes being thrown to heap on the floor. Then Phîi Oat sat on the side of the bed, letting him move to kneel on the floor.
Pat.
Shin grabbed the core of the other's body without saying a single word, when he sent the tip of his tongue to lick the largeness without thinking it disgusting, then moved his tongue all over the entire shaft, until the sound of sucking echoed along with the terrifying silence of this room.
The action made Oat look at the face of the youth in front of him silently. His two hands almost placed on the other's shoulders, but he clenched them tightly instead, turned his face away, letting him do as he wanted. He also pitied himself. Even though his heart hurt this much, his body still had a reaction to this youth to the point of being laughable.
Shin's touch made him feel hot and bothered every time. And this time was no different.
"Mmm..."
Slurp... Gulp... Smack.
The large, expanding part moving in his mouth made Shin pull away and wipe the drool at the corner of his mouth. After that, he pushed the other until he fell thud onto the bed. The fair-skinned but muscular form climbed on top, before pressing a kiss down on his lips perfectly, as if not wanting any words at all.
“Mmm... Ahh...” The kiss that both pressed against each other passionately, exchanging touches hotter than every time. Their bodies moved close together, and also rubbed against each other until the temperature rapidly rose. Meanwhile, Oat slid his hand to grab the large core of the other's body and stroked it skillfully.
The action made Shin not say anything, besides moving his lips along the neck, his hot tongue tip licking the skin, before
“Ow!” Sharp teeth bit down on the strong neck with full force, making Oat cry out. However, he didn't say anything, besides letting Shin bite until clear tooth marks appeared. The tongue tip licked that spot in a way that made Oat startle.
“Uh.” A low groan in his throat, when Shin bent down to lick the nipple forcefully. His other hand also squeezed and kneaded mercilessly, creating turmoil for the person under his body, before pulling the legs of the Head wáak apart wider. He pulled away to look at his own handiwork that appeared as bite marks on the neck and chest.
Pat.
Shin moved his hand to grab the bottle of lubricant in the bedside drawer. It was placed here for him, but today it was for Phîi Oat.
Squelch.
“Ugh!..” Oat closed his eyes tightly when the slippery and cold sensation was being poured onto the rear passage that he never thought to let anyone touch, before a long finger inserted itself without warning. The peculiar feeling of the insertion didn't make him feel as good as the hot breath of Shin that was panting on his body, just as his own body was hot until it almost burned.
At the same time, Shin moved his finger more forcefully, feeling the tight squeezing inside. But he didn't look up to see the expression of his bed partner at this time. He only looked at the passage that was violently swallowing his finger, before inserting another finger without caring what the other party felt.
"Ah... Hah... Ahh..." Oat breathed heavily, when he agreed to spread his legs wider, feeling the foreign object moving inside his body. But before he could adjust to the new feeling,
Slip.
Squelch.
“Ahh!!!! Uh...” Oat clenched his teeth tightly when suddenly the fingers were pulled out, replaced by a burning hot core pressing into his body all at once. There was no gentleness. No tenderness. But it pressed in as if making his body hurt until he had to cry out. But Oat merely clenched his teeth tightly, accepting every part of his ex-romantic partner who was pressing deeper into his body more and more.
It hurt. But it was unforgettable.
Now, the former Head wáak was looking at the face of the person straddling over his body. The person whose whole body was sweaty, his face looking as scary as it was tortured from trying to push himself into the tight passage. But what Oat was trying to memorize wasn't just this expression.
The face... the vividly red hair... the sharp, intense eyes usually full of mystery... the high nose bridge... the lips that, truth be told, were thinner than many women's... the beautiful neck... the unmistakably male physique...
Everything about Shin that he was trying to memorize to remember, including the expression moving inside his body at this moment.
He didn't want anyone else to see. He didn't want anyone else to touch this youth anymore.
The thoughts of the person who pulled Shin down to press a heavy kiss on his lips, when their lower bodies were connected, and also moved towards each other without fear that the other party would collapse in the face of the intensity that made the bed creak creak every time they moved.
“Hah... Hah...” At the same time, Shin moved to nip and suck the dark skin until it turned reddish. He knew Phîi Oat was hurting. But he also didn't think to stop his actions, as if stamping a mark on this body that, even if Phîi Oat had someone, he would never forget the sex he had with him today.
Creak.
“Ah, mmm... more...”
“Mmm... Phîi... Ahh... Hah.”
Every forceful thrust, every panting breath, every drop of sweat that was interweaving, Shin stamped this memory onto that body mercilessly. His lips also expressed ownership of this body as much as possible, when low moans were echoing in his ears, awakening a desire that flared hotter than ever.
“More, ahh, I will, mmm...”
Oat wanted to restrain himself more than this. However, the hand that was stroking to make him come along also didn't pause. The body that was inserted also pounded rapidly. Meanwhile, the half-Thai youth bent down to meet the eyes that had been avoided all along since the start of the hot activity, looking into the eyes of the steadfast man as if memorizing them.
The last time... it was the last time he would do this with Phîi Oat.
Squelch squelch squelch.
“Mmmmmmm!” Loud moans harmonized throughout the room, when both released their desires completely. And at that moment, Shin leaned over to press a kiss on Oat's lips, the gentlest one.
Every action was without words. There were only bodies expressing themselves honestly. And... It hurt the most.
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