Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
~~~
“Phîi Dream, why must you pick on Patty?” Janjao asked.
“When did I pick on her?” Dream replied.
“Right now, you’re being antagonistic to Patty,” Janjao said.
“When was I antagonistic to her, Khun Nong Panty?” Dream retorted.
“My name is Patty, not Panty! Phîi Dream, stop calling me that!” Patty said.
“Well, I like it,” Dream said.
“For years, Phîi Dream, you never change,” Patty said.
“Of course. I’m beautiful, and I’ll always be beautiful,” Dream said.
Dear opened his mouth slightly, observing the two young women arguing, their faces flushed with intensity. No, Patty’s face was flushed, but Jae Dream stood with arms crossed, chin raised, and eyes glaring coldly. Normally, Dear would attempt to stop his Phîi, but this time, frankly… I’m cheering for my sister with all my heart, Dear thought.
“Egotistical!” Patty said.
“I have plenty to be egotistical about,” Dream said with a slight, coldly-aloof smile, stepping forward to shield her Nong, displaying full protective instincts. She examined the young woman before her from head to toe, memorizing Patty’s appearance.
This was the last fem romantic partner Purin had before studying in America, and the one Dream found utterly irritating.
“Phîi Dream acts this way, no wonder you have no romantic partner,” Patty said. If Patty thought this was Darinphan’s weakness, she was completely mistaken. The listener only smiled faintly and said in a sweet voice, “I have no romantic partner, but that doesn’t mean I have no one. My Mâe taught me to choose a man carefully, to think thoroughly, and not to throw myself at just anyone. It makes me seem cheap, without value… right, Khun Nong Panty?”
“Hey, Phîi Dream, are you insulting me?” Patty said.
“Take it if you want. Did I say I was insulting you?” Darinphan said with a sweet smile, fully engaging. She had been annoyed since the days when this high-pitched young woman constantly followed Purin. Not that Dream was jealous or possessive—other people Purin dated never troubled her. But imagine if this young woman truly made Purin fall in love… I’d end my friendship with Nai Purin! Dream thought.
So irritating! Dream thought.
Patty’s clenched fists and the way she turned her face, clearly aware she could never outargue this young woman, revealed her frustration. She glanced at the person in the middle, who didn’t restrain his close friend at all… just as in the past.
That’s how it is. No matter what Phîi Dream does, Phîi Porsche never objects, Patty thought, making her cautious of this young woman.
“Phîi Porsche, shall we find a place to sit and talk? It’s been so long, and I have much to tell you,” Patty said, turning to offer Purin a sweet smile. Purin sighed again, his head aching since these two young women met.
“That won’t do, Khrap,” Purin said.
“What? Why not?” Patty asked.
“Today, I came with my romantic partner, and I don’t want them to misunderstand,” Purin said.
“What! Romantic partner?!” Patty exclaimed, her mouth open, repeating the word in shock. Meanwhile, the words allowed the person standing behind his Phîi to breathe a little easier.
But only briefly, as the young woman before him asked in a high-pitched voice, “Who? Who is Phîi Porsche’s romantic partner?”
This time, the older person turned to look at Dear immediately, causing the little one to flinch. From jealousy, he shifted to panic. Tell her now that Phîi Porsche is with me? What if this Patty tells Porsche’s friends? Dear thought.
No way, don’t do it, Phîi Porsche, don’t! Dear thought.
“Well…” Purin began.
“…Dear,” Purin said.
Thud!
“Jae Dream, just say you’re Phîi Porsche’s romantic partner!” Dear shouted, his eyes wide, pushing his Phîi forward with full force, yelling loudly to drown out Phîi Porsche’s voice amid the noise of market passersby. This made his Phîi turn sharply, glaring at him.
“Âi'Dear…” Dream said.
“Jae Dream, please help me… please!” Dear pleaded softly, raising his hands in a wai, making a pleading face that usually softened his Phîi. Dream glared at him.
“Please, I beg you… please, Jae,” Dear said. He swore his Phîi gritted her teeth before turning back to face Khun Nong Patty, who stared wide-eyed between the two, disbelieving, especially at the handsome young man whose face resembled a question mark.
“Liar! Who are you, Khun? Lying like this isn’t right,” Patty said.
“Uh…” Dear began.
Grab!
“Where’s my junior lying? I’m Porsche’s romantic partner,” Dream said, sighing heavily, grabbing Phîi Porsche’s arm and linking it with hers, speaking with a superior smile that made Patty bite her lip tightly.
“Not true… Is this true, Phîi Porsche?” Patty asked. The question didn’t register with Purin, who was staring at the young man with eyes full of questions. Why, Phîi Porsche, just agree, please, I’m begging you, Dear thought.
The young man, fearing his older person would face trouble later, sent pleading looks, raising his hands in a wai to urge compliance. Purin sighed, ran his hand through his hair forcefully, and turned to his fem romantic partner, who stared expectantly for an answer.
“Ugh, it’s true, Khrap. I’m dating Dream,” Purin said.
If that’s what Dear wants me to say, Purin thought.
“Not true!” Patty exclaimed loudly, her beautiful face showing complete disbelief, prompting Darinphan to flash a smile, tightening her grip on her close friend’s arm.
“Don’t believe it? Well, it’s true. And if you want to talk to Porsche, you’ll go through me. Frankly, I don’t trust you,” Dream said.
Patty pursed her lips tightly, half-believing, half-doubting, knowing these two had always been friends. Suddenly dating? Why didn’t Phîi Dream show signs before? Patty thought.
“Patty, there you are! I searched everywhere for you… What’s happening here?” Patty’s friend approached, prompting her to take a deep breath, suppress her frustration, and offer a sweet smile.
“My friend’s here, so I’ll excuse myself, Khrap. Now I know Phîi Porsche is back in Thailand. I hope next time we can talk privately,” Patty said, quickly grabbing her friend’s arm and pulling her away. Jae Dream’s voice trailed after.
“Don’t you understand plain language? I won’t let you talk to him alone,” Dream said.
The curvaceous young woman vanished, prompting Dream to release her friend’s arm and turn to confront her little brother fully. But someone else stood with the Sailor Moon duo.
“Phîi Tawan!” Bulan shouted.
Darinphan muttered softly, observing the tanned young man who, though not as handsome as his Nong, had a constant smile that added charm with his warm demeanor. Her eyes followed his large hand, noticing a single rose tied with a colorful ribbon, causing her to pause.
“Phîi Tawan… um…” Dream said, her voice trailing.
The warm-eyed young man behind modern glasses snapped to attention. “Oh, I must have come at the wrong time. I meant to surprise Dream, but it seems I’m the one surprised,” Tawan said with his usual smile, turning toward the restaurant’s exit to the parking lot.
“Phîi Tawan…” Dream called.
Whoosh.
“Porsche, take care of the youths,” Dream said to her close friend, grabbing her bag and running after the tall young man. Her unreadable expression made the instigator’s face pale.
“What do we do, Phîi Janjao?” Bulan asked, shaking her Phîi’s arm vigorously, admitting she feared their Phîi, glancing at the older person standing behind Dear.
“I must apologize, Khrap. It’s my fault for spoiling everyone’s fun today,” Purin said, sighing and addressing the group. But this made Dear grip his pants’ hem tightly.
“It’s not because of Phîi Porsche. It’s because of me…” Dear muttered softly.
I’m the one who didn’t know what to do and pushed my sister out like that, Dear thought. I can’t deny that if Phîi Tawan misunderstands, it’s because I forced Jae Dream.
Grab!
“It’s not that, Dear. You’re not wrong. I’m at fault… in many ways,” Purin said, placing a large hand on Dear’s messy hair, ruffling it gently to console, before smiling at the others.
“It’s fine, Phîi. Honestly, I believe with Jae Dream, this is a minor issue,” Sun said with a broad smile, unperturbed, confident his Phîi was reasonable. His two Nongs nodded in support, admitting today brought more than expected.
So much I could cry with deep regret, Bulan thought.
“Oh, if Phîi has anything to settle with that Âi'Shorty, you can go ahead. I’ll take the others back,” Shin-jang said casually, glancing at the short young man who bared his teeth but wilted with a sad puppy dog face when looking at his Phîi Porsche.
“No way, leaving like that,” Purin said.
“Heh, we’re not youths, Phîi. We don’t need a guardian,” Shin-jang said, shrugging slightly, but his eyes met Purin’s with a serious glint, making Purin pause briefly.
“Dear, do you want to continue exploring?” Purin asked.
“Uh, we can return, Khrap,” Dear said. Hearing this, the young man bent down, rummaging through the many bags in one hand, pulling out a bag of colorful cotton candy.
“As an apology, Khrap. I intended to buy this as a gift. Consider it my apology to Nong Janjao and Nong Bulan,” Purin said, pulling Dear’s arm, who gave a sheepish smile.
“Good luck, buddy,” Shin-jang said.
Yes, pray for my luck, Dear thought.
Dear could only think to himself as the half-Thai guy smirked, speaking with sly eyes that made Dear’s arm hairs stand on end. He turned to look at the broad back of the young man walking ahead, sighing.
Will Phîi Porsche be angry that I pushed him onto Jae Dream? Dear thought.
“Phîi Porsche,” Dear said.
“Khrap,” Purin replied.
“Uh, Phîi Porsche,” Dear said.
“Hm,” Purin said.
“Phîi Porsche… turn and look at me a bit,” Dear said.
“I don’t want to crash and send us both off the road,” Purin said.
He’s bloody fucking angry, Dear thought.
Dear concluded to himself, sitting and watching the handsome driver steering his beloved car down the highway with a sad puppy dog face. Seeing Phîi Porsche’s stern expression, focused solely on the road without glancing at him, increased Dear’s anxiety.
“Phîi Porsche, I’m sorry,” Dear said.
“For what?” Purin asked.
“For… uh… saying Jae Dream is Phîi Porsche’s romantic partner… I mean…” Dear stammered, admitting he was nervous since Phîi Porsche furrowed his brow at the market. But in that situation, what could he do? It wasn’t a sufficient excuse, as the older person remained silent, prompting Dear to continue quickly.
“I feared people would judge, you know? Don’t forget, Phîi, we’re both men. If Khun Patty, Panty, whatever, finds out, she’ll spread it around. And who gets hurt? Phîi Porsche, that’s who! I did my best to protect your reputation. So… don’t be angry with me, please, Khrap,” Dear said. His lengthy explanation, ending with a pleading tone, made Purin glance at him briefly.
“If I say I’m not angry…” Purin said.
“I don’t believe you,” Dear said.
“…but what if I’m hurt by you, Dear?” Purin said calmly, making the listener freeze.
“Hurt?” Dear asked.
Hurt by what? I’m the one who should be hurt that your fem romantic partner appeared from who-knows-where! Dear thought.
“I’m hurt because you chose to conceal what we are from everyone, even though I’m ready to be open. And if I’m angry, I’m angry with myself for not being dependable enough for you to feel confident saying what you are to me,” Purin said.
Thud.
It felt as if time stopped. Phîi Porsche spoke calmly, turning to smile, but that smile stabbed the onlooker’s heart, making Dear sigh, shoulders drooping, suddenly exhausted.
“Phîi Porsche, don’t act like it’s simple. You’re the eldest son of Akramethakorn…” Dear said.
“And do you see me as the eldest son of Akramethakorn, or just as your Phîi Porsche?” Purin asked. Dear froze again, took a deep breath, and decided to grab the other’s arm, resting his forehead against it.
“I see you as my Phîi Porsche, the Phîi-next-door I… uh… secretly admire. But I’m serious, Phîi. I don’t want you to tell anyone we’re together. I don’t want you to lose face,” Dear said. The listener tilted his head slightly, the same issue resurfacing.
Whoosh.
Finally, the young man steered the car into a parallel lane, signaled, and pulled over. He turned to look at the young man still resting his forehead quietly.
Grab!
“You worry that much?” Purin asked.
“Yes! I wouldn’t worry so much if I didn’t care!” Dear said, trying to sound snotty to mask his nerves. But it only made the other smile faintly, his large hand wrapping around the messy head, leaning in like a dog nuzzling its owner.
“And aren’t you afraid of pushing Dream onto me?” Purin asked.
Thud.
“Phîi Porsche, are you saying you and Jae Dream…” Dear said, lifting his head immediately, his round eyes trembling slightly. This made Purin sigh long, then flick Dear’s small forehead.
“Ow, that hurts, Phîi Porsche!” Dear said.
“See? I haven’t been dependable enough for you to trust me fully,” Purin said.
“Ugh, Phîi Porsche, you’re teasing me! Hey, I trust you in everything… uh… except…” Am I wrong? It’s stuck in my mind. The first time we were together, my Phûa called out someone else’s name. Even if it was a misunderstanding, it’s stuck in my mind, you understand? Dear thought.
The little one’s sullen face made the onlooker rest his head on Dear’s messy hair again.
“I’ll make you trust me more. But believe me, Dream and I are nothing beyond very close friends,” Purin said.
“Khrap,” Dear said.
“And about telling others…” Purin began.
“Don’t tell, Phîi Porsche… don’t tell anyone… please,” Dear said softly, clearly unwilling to let the other reveal their relationship, making the older person, prepared for any consequences since realizing he loved this little one, yield.
“Okay, I won’t tell if you don’t want me to,” Purin said.
That was enough for the little one to beam, lifting his head to show neat white teeth, making Purin shake his head slightly, feeling he indulged Dear too much, as Dream said. But seeing that white face and red lips showing satisfaction, he felt mischievous.
Grab!
“That’s the price for my silence,” Purin said.
“Mmph!” Dear could only groan in his throat as warm lips pressed against his, kissing firmly as if teasing, then softening, with only a warm tongue gently tracing his upper and lower lips.
The kiss made the little one moan a few times before yielding, opening his mouth to accept the hot tongue probing deeply, responding adorably with his own. The sound of their sweet exchange filled the car’s cabin, their faces tilting for the perfect angle, lips pressing closer.
Dear’s responsive kissing, much improved since their first time, made the one tasting the sweetness reluctant to stop at a kiss.
“Ah…” Dear’s flushed face let out a moan as their lips parted, a glistening thread connecting the tip of the older person’s tongue. A thumb gently wiped the corner of Dear’s mouth.
“I’m starting to want more than a kiss,” Purin said.
“Hey, Phîi Porsche, this is already more than the price!” Dear said, brushing off embarrassment by turning his face away. The onlooker laughed, pressing his nose against Dear’s white cheek with a loud smack before pulling back.
“You made me feel hurt, so why not?” Purin said.
“No way!” Dear muttered softly, unable to shake the feeling that things had reversed somehow.
Wait, shouldn’t I be the one upset with Phîi Porsche since his fem romantic partner appeared? Dear thought.
Realizing this (as he was only clever in studies), Dear turned to look at the young man driving back onto the road, deciding briefly to use his usual tactic.
“Phîi Porsche,” Dear said.
“Hm,” Purin said.
“Phîi Porsche,” Dear said.
“Khrap,” Purin said.
“Uh, Phîi Porsche… have you ever slept with Khun Patty?” Dear asked.
Thud!
“What?” Purin nearly slammed the brakes but regained composure, turning to the questioner with an unexpected question, making Dear adopt a serious expression, trying to sound firmer.
“I’m asking if you ever had sex, made love, or slept with Khun Patty,” Dear repeated. He almost wished he could turn back time, seeing Phîi Porsche’s unreadable expression, focusing back on the road, avoiding his face.
This isn’t hurt anymore—it’s bloody fucking nervous, isn’t it? Dear thought.
“And so what, Dear? That’s in the past,” Purin said, not answering directly.
“Hey, Phîi Porsche, not answering means you’re afraid I’ll worry too much! No need to think like that. It’s the past, right? That’s why I asked. I don’t get jealous over someone you ended things with,” Dear said, though everything he said contradicted his heart.
Worry too much? A lot. Want to be petty? Absolutely. Jealous? Bloody fucking jealous, Dear thought.
“Sure?” Purin asked.
“Surer than sure,” Dear said. Sure, my ass, Âi'Dear, Dear thought.
Purin glanced at the little one, seeing his beaming face, pretending not to care, unlike his hands gripping his T-shirt tightly. Purin paused, then decided to answer simply, “Yes.”
“I knew it… How many times, Phîi?” Dear asked.
Damn my mouth, why ask about this painful stuff? It just hurts, but I bloody fucking want to know, Dear thought.
Dear stared at the young man beside him, eyes blinking, desperate to know. This made the one with the unreadable expression want to evade the question, but since he promised to earn this young man’s trust, he answered honestly.
“I don’t recall how many times I was with Patty,” Purin said.
“So, many,” Dear said.
“Dear… I don’t recall what I did with anyone or how much because it wasn’t important to me. I don’t remember who I was with, okay? I admit I was bad, but I’m just a man. With unimportant people, I don’t remember. But with important people… I remember,” Purin said, glancing at the young man beside him before focusing back on the road.
His demeanor showed who was important to Purin now.
The words made the Nong-next-door pause, then smile.
“Hey, Phîi Porsche, you don’t need to sound so stern. I said I’m not petty, okay? I understand, I won’t ask anymore. It’s over, so why dwell on it, right?” Dear said confidently, as if dismissing all unease, prompting the listener to ruffle his hair.
“Make it true, little one,” Purin said.
“It’s true! Your little one means it, thinks it, really… By the way, Phîi Porsche, want something to eat? I’ll grab it for you. Because of all this, you haven’t eaten anything,” Dear said, swiftly changing the subject, easing the listener’s heart.
“Anything easy to hold,” Purin said. Dear rummaged through the many bags, finding something easy to eat and handing it to the driver, who took it.
“There’s only water in the car, Phîi. Is water okay?” Dear asked.
“But I want a Coke,” Purin said.
“What? You didn’t say earlier! How am I supposed to find it? Wait… Coke?” Dear said.
Dear shouted loudly, then quieted as something triggered a memory about that fizzy black drink and himself. His mind raced, and his white cheeks flushed red.
Is that Coke the drink or… my mouth? Dear thought.
“Drink the water,” Dear muttered to himself, turning to look out the window, barely noticing the passing scenery, his head full of questions but resolved not to ask.
What Phîi Porsche said is enough, Dear thought.
***
[That Pandy girl? Ugh, the most irritating fem romantic partner Porsche ever had. No idea why he picked her. Maybe because she’s good at buying stuff. Don’t dwell on it.] Dream said over the phone line.
“And why did they break up, Jae?” Dear asked.
[Because Porsche went to study abroad. They dated for, what, a month? Then they parted ways. Porsche didn’t seem to care much from the start, and Pandy wasn’t going to wait for someone studying abroad for years. That’s it.]
Feeling relieved, Dear asked another question, smiling dryly, “Thanks, Jae Dream. Uh, what about Phîi Tawan, Jae?”
…
“Jae Dream,” Dear said.
[I don’t know, and I don’t care. I told him already. Whatever he thinks is his business. I told him from the start he couldn’t handle a young woman like me. If he stops bothering, I was right.]
“And Jae…” Dear began.
[Ugh, don’t ask about me. I can handle myself. You watch out for that underwear little girl. She’ll come back to pester!]
With that, his beloved Phîi hung up, making the listener feel guiltier but trying to stay optimistic that Jae Dream could handle it, as always. Dear rose from the computer chair, headed to the bathroom, and looked at his reflection in the mirror.
Whoosh.
“Argh, Âi'Dear, what are you thinking?” Dear said aloud. Yes, his round eyes were gazing down at… his chest.
Phîi Porsche said he loves me, that’s it, right, Dear? Him sleeping with a young woman isn’t a big deal, Dear thought.
Even saying that, he couldn’t help thinking about it. Recalling Khun Patty’s ample chest, he couldn’t stop comparing himself.
A flush overcame him. I know I’m a young man, but being a young man makes me… Dear thought. Not a young woman, not skilled at that stuff, always bloody fucking embarrassed when Phîi Porsche does anything.
Dear sighed again, looking at his reflection, seeing a skinny young man in basketball shorts and an oversized jersey, his only asset his pale skin. He ran his hands through his hair forcefully and took a deep breath.
“You’re a young man, what’s to fear? Go for it!” Dear said to himself, though his face flushed red.
Slap!
“Let’s do it… I’ll go all-in like a real young man. Phîi Porsche wouldn’t keep doing me multiple times if he didn’t like me,” Dear said, slapping his cheeks for courage, stepping out of the bathroom with full determination. But did he forget that his so-called “real young man” approach so far was merely moaning for Phîi Porsche?
***
Let’s go back to see what happened after Dranphat’s beautiful Phîi ran after the young man she always insisted… wasn’t her romantic partner.
“Phîi Tawan!” Dream called, her short-heeled woven sandals stepping quickly after the tall young man with broad shoulders. But he didn’t turn, making Darinphan purse her lips tightly.
“If Phîi Tawan doesn’t stop, don’t bother with Dream ever again!” Dream said.
Thud.
With that ultimatum, the tanned young man halted immediately, turning to face the slender figure. His usually warm eyes behind glasses turned stern and intimidating, but of course, Jae Dream, the little one’s fierce sister, never feared anyone.
Not afraid… but perhaps a bit uneasy, Dream thought.
“Why is Phîi Tawan walking away from me?” the young woman asked, stepping closer, knowing well why he was leaving. This prompted him to offer a faint smile, glancing at the single rose in his hand.
“Here…” Tawan’s deep voice began, pausing briefly before meeting her eyes. “…I thought you might not be free to talk to me now. I’d better return,” Tawan said.
“Phîi Tawan, that’s the wrong answer,” Dream said, interrupting with her sweet voice, observing the tall figure in a dark dress shirt and polite pants, his sharp face showing clear exhaustion. She realized he came straight to her without stopping home.
Almost every time he came ashore, the first place he went wasn’t home or to rest, but… to where she was.
Phîi just wanted to see Dream’s face. I saw you, so… I’ll head home, Khrap, Tawan had often said.
Every time, this young man asked for just a minute to see her face, to talk… and he was satisfied. It stirred her small heart more each time, enough to make her run after him like this.
“Khrap?” Tawan said.
“What Phîi Tawan should say is… who’s that man, not whether I’m free,” Darinphan said, lifting her chin slightly, though her eyes softened… unlike the fierce Jae Dream of Dear or the wicked Jae Dream of Sun.
She had softened for this young man for months.
Tawan wanted to sigh, looking at the stubborn eyes of the beautiful young woman before him, and decided to speak with a smile that clearly felt forced. “I just learned you have a romantic partner, after knowing you for over two years…” Tawan said.
“He’s not my romantic partner,” Dream said.
Thud.
Before Tawan could finish, the young woman interrupted, stepping closer, lifting her chin to meet his dark eyes, speaking earnestly. “Porsche is my friend, and I know you must wonder why I said he’s my romantic partner. I have reasons, but I can’t tell you, because someone wants to keep it hidden. I can explain only this much. It’s up to you to believe me or not,” Darinphan said with a faint smile. Her words showed that whatever reason she couldn’t fully share… she cared deeply for that person.
Since Dear wants to hide it, no matter how much I disagree, I, Darinphan, will help my little brother with everything… even if it means upsetting the young man before me, Dream thought.
“Do you like that young man?” Tawan asked.
“No, I love him,” Dream said, making Tawan freeze, his sharp eyes stunned. The slender figure continued firmly, “But not in the way you think. He’s important to me, a friend, a brother, family…” And the one I let take care of my only little brother, Dream thought.
Then, her slender legs stepped back, pulling the ribbon-tied rose up. Though not a grand bouquet to delight a young woman, she knew that whether one flower or many, it carried this young man’s feelings for her all along.
“I’ve always told you, when you can’t handle me, you don’t have to try, Khrap,” Dream said.
It wasn’t arrogance or unwillingness to have someone, but fear… fear that one day he wouldn’t tolerate her personality.
The young woman spoke with a faint smile, though deep in her strong eyes, sadness flickered. She turned to head back to her car, no longer in the mood to continue the outing.
“Dream…” Tawan called.
“Khrap?” Dream said, pausing slightly at his deep voice.
“I never have to tolerate anything. Everything I do, I do willingly,” Tawan said.
That’s why he’s the first young man in years to break through my defenses, Dream thought.
“And if you stop doing it willingly, tell me, Khrap,” Dream said, stepping away immediately, her slender hand gently holding the rose.
I don’t like this. I don’t like this feeling of my heart not being my own, Dream thought.
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