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At eight o’clock, Payu turned the car into the driveway of his brightly lit house. He knew well it wasn't his twin's doing, but the handiwork of the little one who had practically moved his household registration into his home. The tall figure gathered his belongings with one hand, then walked into the house. He stopped by the kitchen and found only an empty instant noodle bowl placed in the sink, but no trace of the eater on the first floor.
Shaking his head slowly at the scene, Payu placed his belongings on the dining table, pulled out a new plate, and unpacked the fried rice, putting it in the microwave to heat.
While waiting for the food to warm, the young man turned to pour water into a glass.
Ding!
Once the fried rice was fragrant and looked delicious again, Payu placed the plate on a tray, picked up a spoon, and grabbed the ice-cold glass of water. Then, he walked up to the second floor of the house, heading straight to his study... which had been taken over.
Previously, this room was where he worked. But now, the little one had completely commandeered it as his personal "nest."
And why call it a nest? Well, apart from his own books neatly arranged on the shelves and the desktop computer that hadn't been turned on for months, which looked orderly, everything else was a mess. The large desk he used to work at had become a place for a small laptop and numerous documents instead. The floor was littered with wood shavings, paper scraps, not to mention equipment and items scattered haphazardly everywhere.
The person responsible for the mess was sitting intently focused on the model in his hands, completely unaware that he had returned.
"Rain, I'm back."
"Huh, you're back?"
Warain, the little one now in his second year, made a sound from behind his unfinished work, but didn't even glance at his boyfriend, who placed the tray of warm food on the table.
"Have you eaten anything yet?"
"Huh?" The person answering didn't even seem to hear what was asked, making Payu tilt his head.
"What time did you eat?"
"Huh?"
"Aren't you hungry?"
"Huh?"
No matter what he asked, the little one only responded with 'huh,' his hands and eyes still intently focused on the unfinished work. Payu just sighed, looking at the pale face that now looked much more wan than fair. The large, round eyes were squinting wearily under dark circles, like someone who had been messed with, but that wasn't it. This was the normal state when rushing to meet a project deadline.
Advancing to a higher year meant more work than the first year. Furthermore, entering major-specific courses wasn't just about adjusting from high school basics to university level; Warain also had to adapt to it. The clingy kid from the holidays now barely had time to snuggle with him.
While Payu slept, it was time for Rain to be wide awake, working to finish his tasks. And when Payu went out to work, it was when Rain had just gone to bed.
Payu understood well that the lifestyle of an architecture student wasn't like other people's. So, he was never once angry that the little one had no time for him, even though before, when Rain had free time, he himself was busy with his main job, work at the garage, not to mention racing, but he always made time for Rain. Because Payu understood; he had also been through his time as a university student.
Before, Rain prepared breakfast and dinner for him. Now, it was his turn to provide supplies.
As for why Rain was holed up in this house, the reason was simple: it was much closer to the university than his own home. As long as he could shorten the travel time to increase work hours, the little one would agree to anything, making Payu amused remembering the day Rain came begging to leave his work here.
Now, Payu's house had become the small figure's dormitory.
Thump!
"Rain, eat." The young man placed his hands on the shoulders of the person who was so sleepy his eyes were barely open.
"Huh! Oh! When did you get back, Phîi Payu?" The person focused on his work looked up to meet his gaze, asking confusedly. Normally, Payu might tease him, but he knew he shouldn't now, so he spoke in a gentle tone.
"I brought food for you. Get up and eat first, then continue working."
The taller figure gestured towards the plate of fried rice, making Rain follow his gaze. But the person who looked exhausted just said...
"I'll eat later, Phîi. Just a little more." Then he turned back to focus on his unfinished work, making Payu shake his head.
Ffft!
"Is there anything I can help with?" The tall figure leaned in to kiss his cheek, asking with concern.
"No, it's fine. Rain can manage. Rain's okay," the small figure looked up, forcing a smile that Payu could see wasn't as confident as his words claimed. But...
In a soft voice, "Rain can do it, right, Phîi Payu? You just came back tired. Instead of helping Rain, go take a bath, eat, and rest, Phîi." The speaker tried to force cheerfulness, even though his eyes were starting to turn red. This made Payu hug the small figure tightly to encourage him, saying,
"Fighting, you capable person."
Thump!
Warain hugged his waist in response, burying his face against his stomach for a moment, taking a deep breath before pulling away.
"Fight to the death!" The little one gave a smile, then returned to work again. He didn't ask his boyfriend for help, even though he knew Payu could help.
While Payu also knew Rain was forcing himself, since he insisted he didn't need help, he just gave a pat on the head, then turned and left the room, not wanting to disturb his concentration. The homeowner went down to eat some food himself, came up to shower, opened his laptop to work a bit, then stopped by the nest again, only to find the little bird, the nest's owner, sitting with a stern expression in front of the computer, his hands typing non-stop. Judging by the state of things, he was probably pulling an all-nighter, no different from every other day, until Payu turned to look at the plate of food...
Not a single bite touched.
The tall figure walked over, picked up the plate, and heated it once more, then brought it back to its original place.
The last thing he saw before returning to the bedroom was Warain using the back of his hand to wipe his face, as if wiping away tears.
The next day, Payu returned home at the same time with two boxes of food. He did the same routine: heated the food, then took it up to the person working in the nest. But....
"Rain! What's wrong?"
The little one, who was grinding away at work day in and day out, was sitting crying while working on his model, his hands shaking slightly. This made the observer quickly put down the tray, rushing over to grab his shoulders, turning Rain to face him.
"What's wrong with Rain? Tell me."
"Nothing. Rain has to work," Warain said in a trembling voice, pulling Payu's hand away.
"You can leave the work for later. Tell me first what happened."
Smack!
"Don't bother Rain!"
Suddenly, the crying person swatted Payu's hand away with full force, yelling out so loudly that the listener was stunned. Meanwhile, his face was pale, his eyes completely red.
"Rain," Payu didn't look angry, just called out in a soothing tone.
"What's wrong with Rain? Got scolded by the professor, right? What the fuck am I doing in this faculty? Why do I have to get scolded over and over like this? The work never ends. Why the fuck can't I finish anything? If you know, then get out! I have to work, hear me? I have to work!" This time, the person who hadn't slept shouted loudly, echoing through the room, then breathed heavily, staring at Payu as if he wanted to tear him apart.
The observer sighed at the scene.
Thump!
Payu pulled the small figure into a tight hug, ignoring his struggling for a moment before he stopped struggling on his own.
"I understand. Then I won't disturb Rain's work time anymore." The deep voice said just that, and the speaker was the one who quietly walked out of the study, leaving the little one to do as he wished.
Thump!
"Rain is sorry, Hic! Phîi Payu, Rain is sorry."
Payu had just taken two bites of his dinner when the little one ran over and hugged him from behind, pressing his face against his shoulder, sobbing so hard his body shook. This made him stop, pushing his chair back from the table just enough to pull the distraught person...
onto his lap.
"Come here."
Rain easily let himself be settled on the lap, still pressing his face against the broad shoulder, allowing Payu to rub his back.
"Rain is sorry, don't be angry at Rain, Hic! Ug... don't be angry at Rain." The emotionally upset person who realized his mistake said in a trembling voice. Tears fell drop by drop, streaming down his cheeks, soaking into the broad shoulder. His body trembled, and his two hands hugged Payu's neck tightly as if it were his last anchor.
"I'm not angry at Rain."
"Rain is sorry, Rain shouldn't have... thrown a tantrum at you. Rain knows you were worried, but Rain still... Hic!... took it out on you." The more the little one spoke, the more he sobbed, to which Payu just gave a slight smile, holding the stubborn youth tightly. He could tell exactly how bad a state the other was in, so he would never be so cruel as to tease and upset him further.
"Rain has apologized, and I've stopped being angry, okay?"
The less angry Payu was, the more the remorseful person cried uncontrollably, sobbing until his body shook as if the dam of endurance had completely collapsed.
Rain didn't know how much time had passed. He just cried, cried enough, cried fittingly for having endured for weeks, and then opened his mouth to explain.
"Rain got scolded by the professor. No matter how hard I try to do well, it's never good enough; always too much or too little. Both the scolding and the harsh criticism have made my heart feel completely rotten. Rain ends up asking myself every day why I'm studying in this fucking faculty. Why am I sitting here working like a miser while others are with their families, with their partners? Why does Rain have to sit and do this crazy work that the professor will never appreciate?!" Once he started venting, Rain spoke until it was all out, while holding the tall figure tightly.
"Rain wants to be with Phîi Payu, wants to spend time with you. So Rain tries to finish it, but it's never finished!" The speaker said with restraint, then pressed his face against the shoulder again.
He... missed this embrace almost desperately.
They lived in the same house, but Warain felt like he hadn't talked to Phîi Payu in ages.
Everything he tried was to have time to hug Phîi Payu tightly like this, but instead, he had taken out his frustrations on the person who took care of him.
Meanwhile, Payu listened intently to everything, looking at the dark-circled eyes that were now bloodshot. This made him pull Rain to his feet.
Thump!
"Phîi Payu!" Rain cried out in surprise at being picked up, then was carried back upstairs. He was alarmed, thinking the other wanted more than just hugging. Not that he didn't want it—he did, he was a man too. After not doing anything for over three weeks, just touching made him feel hot all over; he wanted to do more. But he couldn't. Because he had a project due tomorrow; no way could he do what his heart desired!
The thought made Rain feel a surge of anger towards his field of study.
"Shhh, I'm not going to do anything," the tall figure whispered reassuringly, pulling the blanket up to his chest.
"But you need to rest first."
"But the work..."
"Sleep for just an hour, then I'll wake you. I caught a glimpse earlier; there isn't much left, right?" Payu propped himself on the pillow, placing a hand on Rain's stomach gently, as if lulling a three-year-old to sleep. This made the sleep-deprived person whose brain wasn't working bury his face against him.
Right now, the little one was too tired to refuse the kindness.
He knew that even working all night, he would barely make it. But since Phîi Payu said so, he believed it must be possible.
"Sleep, good kid. Rain has tried his best. Don't worry, don't be anxious. I understand how Rain feels. I can always wait for Rain. But now, Rain needs to take care of his health first." Payu whispered by his ear, as if it were a lullaby, making the wide-awake person slowly sink into slumber... bit by bit... until soft snores emerged.
The sight of the utterly exhausted person made Payu stroke the hair away from his face affectionately.
"How could I be angry at you, hmm? I can see how hard Rain is trying."
Payu pressed a kiss to his forehead once, then got up from the bed, rolling up his sleeves to his elbows.
But Rain had forgotten one thing... Rain had a boyfriend with honors degree qualifications.
Whoosh!
"Hey! What time is it?!"
Rain felt like he was having déjà vu from his first year, waking up in the morning to find he had overslept past the project deadline. Because the moment he opened his eyes, the sky was bright, meaning he hadn't just slept for an hour, but had slept soundly through the whole night!
The thought made him grab his phone to check the time... six o'clock.
Yes, it wasn't late yet, but it meant that no matter how fast he rushed, he wouldn't finish the project in time!
The young man bolted upright from the bed immediately, running to the study with a face full of fear, but...
"Oh! You're awake?"
"Phîi Payu, that..."
His wide eyes grew even wider, because not only was Phîi Payu in this room, but in Phîi Payu's hands was... the completed work!
This time, Rain rushed forward, but not towards the beautifully executed project, but towards the tall man who was still in the same work clothes from yesterday!
"Phîi... did you work on this all night...?"
The speaker's voice trembled, because he knew well that this was Phîi Payu's usual waking and preparation time for work. It meant Phîi Payu had also stayed up all night to finish his work for him. Tears welled up in his eyes, his heart filled with guilt for causing trouble for his boyfriend. But...
Thump!
"Why are you crying? Did you forget what I said when I asked to be your boyfriend?" Payu raised his hands to hug his waist. He wanted to wipe his tears, but his hands were dirty.
"I said I could help Rain with everything. Did we get a boyfriend with honors degree qualifications just to decorate the house? If you can't manage, just ask. I'm always ready to help," Payu said gently, but the small figure still protested through his tears.
"But Phîi Payu is already tired from work. Rain feels bad."
"What are Rain and I to each other?" Payu asked in a stern voice.
"Boyfriends," the little one whispered tremulously, because was Phîi Payu saying that between boyfriends, there's no need to feel bad? However...
"Wrong."
Payu stood up to his full height, looking at the person whose complexion was much better than last night's, but who now looked upset at his word 'wrong.'
"Because we're not just boyfriends. Have you forgotten, Mia?"
They weren't just boyfriends, but were practically husband and wife already.
The question made Rain smile, throwing himself forward to hug Payu's neck tightly.
"Rain can ask for your help, right?"
"Of course. Why wouldn't I help my own Mia? Just losing sleep for a night or two won't make me sick. Don't forget, I've been through it all before," Payu said jokingly, hugging the small figure tightly and swaying back and forth comfortingly. Rain smiled sweetly, laughing out loud for the first time in a month.
"If the professor scolds you, don't take it to heart. But if you can't stand it, come and vent to me. I'm always ready to listen, understand?" Rain nodded so hard his neck almost came off, holding the other tightly.
"Thank you, Phîi Payu. Thank you."
"I don't ask for much."
"Okay," the grateful person looked up to meet his eyes, and Payu said in a serious tone,
"Just spare half an hour each day to have dinner with me, that's enough."
He truly only asked for that.
Architecture students don't have much time, so anyone who thinks of loving one must understand.
The negotiation made Rain hug the tall figure tightly, agreeing in a trembling voice. Then, apologies poured from the mouth of the youth who couldn't manage his time well. But Rain swore that from now on, he would definitely get himself organized.
Back then, Phîi Payu taught him that if you want to love, you must know how to fulfill your own duties well. But he had forgotten. Sometimes, duty can come together with the heart as well.
"Rain promises, Rain will make more time for you than this. Rain will manage time better than this."
"You don't need more than this. Just that in the time Rain is free, Rain thinks of me sometimes, that's enough," Payu said affectionately, giving a quick kiss to the forehead of the person who hadn't showered since yesterday. His two arms hugged the small frame loosely, watching the person nod so hard his neck almost came off. He knew better than to ask for time from a student of this faculty. So, not much was needed; just the minute or two when Rain was tired, and Rain knew who was worried about him, that was enough.
"Rain already thinks of Phîi Payu."
"Mhmm. But my good kid should go take a shower and get ready to submit the work now. Otherwise, my efforts will be in vain," Payu said jokingly, because if he didn't let go, it seemed the little gecko wouldn't let go either until it was too late. This made Rain nod vigorously.
"Mhmm. Just wait and see. Rain won't disappoint you." The speaker let go of Payu, said with determination, then ran out of the room to shower and get dressed.
By the time he was dressed and ready, he found that Payu had used another bathroom and was now ready to leave the house.
"Rain." The person who was loading the work into the car turned to look at the sound of his name, and was met with a handsome smile.
"Anything special you want to eat tonight?"
"No," the little one shook his head, before saying in a voice brighter than before,
"Because no matter what, as long as I get to eat with Phîi Payu, it's enough."
This answer made the listener realize that he was prepared to patiently wait for the other to have time for him.
It's okay. Just a few more years; why couldn't he wait for Rain to graduate?
The thought of the person watching the car's taillights as it drove away from the house.
Meanwhile, Rain looked in the rearview mirror to see Phîi Payu seeing him off, then turned to look at the beautiful work done by his boyfriend's hand. His hands gripped the steering wheel tighter.
"I can do this."
He had to fulfill his own duties well, while simultaneously protecting this heart.
Rain promised himself that he wouldn't let himself break down like this again, wouldn't make the owner of his heart worry so much, and wouldn't let his own heart feel so lonely again. He himself missed Phîi Payu almost unbearably. Therefore, first, start with... dinner with his loved one, which he hadn't had for almost a month.
"Phîi Payu, wait for me," Rain whispered.
A request that, if Payu heard it, he would gladly answer that he had been prepared to wait since the first day he thought of courting an architecture student. As they say, to love an architecture youth, one must understand. And Payu was confident he understood Rain better than anyone. Therefore, why couldn't Nai Payu wait for something like this, right?
End of Special Episode.
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