Content Warning: This work is intended for mature (NC17) audiences. If you are younger, please kindly leave this site.
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Who would have believed that just a few words could make a young man who had heard every form of flattery sit back down on the bed willingly? A large hand moved to gently touch the pale cheek, listening to the sick young man who muttered with a hoarse, dry voice, his eyes red-rimmed.
“Don’t go.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Khrap. I’m right here.”
Snap!
But the sick young man still shook his head, disbelieving Phra Phai’s words. The hand clutching the back of Phra Phai’s shirt tightened its grip, forcing him to move his hand to feel the forehead, gently massage the temples, then stroke the sweat-dampened hair softly. The sharp-featured face offered a smile. The deep voice was gentle and pleasant to hear.
“I just want to wipe you down so you can sleep comfortably.”
Smack!
But the sick young man, whose eyes drooped again, gripped Phra Phai’s shirt even tighter, making a sound like a sob in his throat without any tears, clearly resisting the idea of Phra Phai getting up to fetch a towel to wipe him down. Phra Phai did not think that someone so sick he did not recognize who was in front of him would protest out of fear of being stripped and molested. Sky really seemed not to want him to go anywhere.
As for how Phra Phai knew Sky was not in his right mind? Well, no matter how sick he was, this youth would not grab Phra Phai’s shirt and whine like this. He would more likely say he was fine and tell Phra Phai to get lost.
Suddenly, the well-built young man felt an indescribable irritation.
Who was in Sky’s head right now?
Who was this youth trying so hard to hold onto?
But Phra Phai suppressed his irritation first. He was not the type to take his frustrations out on anyone, especially a sick young man drenched in sweat. So, the large hand continued to stroke the hair, watching the young man who, even with his eyes closed again, was still frowning deeply. From initially grabbing Phra Phai’s shirt with one hand, he was now clutching it with both hands, as if his subconscious was telling him not to let go.
It made the young man who was almost never irritated feel even more dissatisfied.
If the person in Sky’s head was Phra Phai, he would be delighted. But it seemed that was not the case.
“Let go of me first, so I can wipe you down.”
“Hng.” The sick young man made a sobbing sound of protest, moving closer until his forehead pressed against Phra Phai’s slim hips, causing the well-built young man to shift and lean against the headboard, moving his hand to support the back of Sky’s neck to slip a pillow under for comfortable support. His sharp eyes watched the young man who was so weak there was no trace left of the coldly-aloof youth from before.
Once Phra Phai showed no intention of getting up to leave, the sick young man calmed down.
The tall young man did not know how long he had been stroking the hair, comforting Sky to sleep. Maybe a few minutes, or maybe several dozen minutes, because his sharp eyes were just fixed on the pale slice of face of the young man clinging tightly to him. His brain tried to push away the feeling of irritation rising in his chest, telling himself that the other young man was sick.
All sick people act clingy like this; it’s not because they mistakenly think I’m someone else, Phra Phai thought.
“Sigh! You’ve been a bad youth, Sky, making me worry about you to this extent.”
This was the first time Phra Phai had ever been so worried about someone that he abandoned his work.
Now that Phra Phai had to sit still, just watching the suffering expression of the young man tormented by fever, he had time to reflect on the frantic, almost crazy feeling he had when he heard the news from Warain. He might play around a lot, but that did not mean he was heartless. When he heard news that a friend was sick, a relative was unwell, or one of his romantic partners was not doing well, he did have the heart to visit. But every time was completely different from this time.
When Phleng had the flu years ago, Phra Phai just called from England and told him to get well soon. And that was his dear Nong. But this…
“We’re not even anything to each other.”
Phra Phai’s relationship with Sky was no different from that of strangers.
Having slept together one night did not make their status shift from strangers to anything special. But he was still worried.
He was currently finding excuses for himself: Was it because I want him but haven’t gotten him yet? Was it because this youth is different from others who, besides being uninterested, also want to keep their distance? Was it because it’s a novelty I encounter only rarely that I’m so captivated? Phra Phai thought.
“Looking for excuses for your Phô, Phra Phai? If I’m worried, I’m worried, bloody fucking hell.” Finally, he shrugged, stubbornly stopping the thought.
He was worried about Sky for whatever reason; he did not care. He wanted to know more about who was in Sky’s head right now.
The thoughts of the young man whose hand was buried in the soft, dark hair, now damp with large beads of sweat. But the young man did not mind in the least, still gently touching Sky’s head. He pulled Sky’s hand, which was still clutching the back of his shirt, and placed it properly on the mattress, preparing to get up and fulfill his original goal… to wipe him down.
But…
Smack!
“Hng.”
The sick young man grabbed Phra Phai’s hand tightly, making his resolve waver.
“I need to wipe you down, good boy. Let go of my hand first.” Seeing the sick young man’s bright red cheeks, Phra Phai could not help but lean in, intending to steal a kiss or two from the sick young man, considering it an advance reward.
“Phô.”
But before the tip of Phra Phai’s nose could touch the cheek, a single word escaped Sky’s lips, leaving the listener completely still.
“Huh!? Phô!”
Phra Phai immediately propped himself up, looking at the sick young man who was still muttering uncomfortably, saying “Phô” many times, until understanding suddenly became clear in his head. The stern expression from a moment ago gradually melted into a smile, then changed into laughter.
Phô? So I was angry because I was mistaken for Sky’s Phô?
Well, bloody fucking hell, I should be angry at being called so old, but knowing that Sky was calling for his Phô, I actually felt relieved, Phra Phai thought.
Not only that.
Bloody fucking adorable!
Who would have thought that the youth who looked at him with such cold eyes would have an attractive, Phô-attached side? This made Phra Phai move his hand to encircle the little one’s shoulders, pulling him into an embrace. His other hand pulled the blanket to properly cover the sick young man’s body. He felt the temperature higher than normal but was not annoyed.
On the contrary, he grinned widely, almost to his ears, when the sick young man moved his hands to hug Phra Phai’s waist tightly, shifting into the embrace in a way he would never normally do. The restless demeanor, as if trapped in a bad dream, was replaced only by a peace that was charming.
“I didn’t do anything to our friend, Warain. I’m just acting as a stand-in Phô for Sky.”
The boundaries of “not doing anything” probably don’t include hugging to give warmth to a sick young man, right? Phra Phai thought.
Thinking like that, Phra Phai hugged the slender frame even tighter. And Sky was so attractive because the sick young man squirmed, rubbing his cheek against Phra Phai’s chest as if searching for a comfortable spot. Once satisfied, the little one buried his face near the slope of the shoulder, lay still, and fell deeply asleep again.
“Should I hug you tighter?”
How could the sick young man possibly answer? But Phra Phai took the silence as the best answer, so the embrace tightened even more, holding the slender frame firmly.
“Should I stroke your head some more?”
Of course, there was no answer again, while Phra Phai stroked the hair as he pleased, slipping a leg in to entangle with the little one’s legs until their bodies were snug and close, almost as one.
“Then, I… ask for one kiss, okay?”
“Hng.”
Good Lord! If I could have this doll to sleep with at my house, I swear I’d willingly throw away all the throw pillows! Phra Phai thought.
He knew the sick young man was groaning, annoyed by the whispered questions repeated by his ear. But the word he thought he heard sounded like clear consent, did it not? So, it would not be wrong, would it, to press a kiss onto the earlobe, then move the tip of his nose to bury it in the unprotected white neck, inhaling the scent of Sky’s body with full satisfaction, muttering with his mouth.
“I still haven’t done anything to our friend, Warain.”
Since permission was given, it shouldn’t be considered “doing anything,” right? Phra Phai thought.
If Warain heard this sentence, he would likely retort that it depends on the intention. And for someone like Phra Phai, this is called having impure intentions!
But would Phra Phai care? He knew his intentions were not pure since he tricked Sky into giving his number for the apartment rep, you know. And he cared even less about anyone’s face when…
“Hng.” The sick young man was clinging to him like this…
Anyone who would let go is a dim-wit, then! Phra Phai thought.
Even though Phra Phai wanted to continue being a hot water bottle for the sick young man indefinitely, seeing the flushed face and body drenched in sweat, no matter how he thought about it, he could not bring himself to have wicked thoughts. On the contrary, the perfectly healthy young man who never got sick felt sorry for the little one who was frowning in torment. Reluctantly, he got up from the warm body.
First, he needed to wipe Sky down, change his clothes, and also change these pieces of bedsheets.
Of course, he had never done it before, but that did not mean he could not learn.
Soon, the tall young man returned to the room again with a damp towel. He managed to pull the blanket down to Sky’s feet, hardening his heart against the sick young man who immediately started shivering. However, the hardest part was not nursing a sick young man, something he had never done in his life, but rather not doing anything to the sick young man while being tasked with stripping him completely naked!
Ugh!
I’m really not having wicked thoughts, you know. I just grab, take off, and take it all off at once to save time, Phra Phai thought.
“Bloody fucking hell! Bloody fucking sexy!”
How could I ever think I could find anyone more attractive than this? Phra Phai thought.
The young man lying in front of him might not be as attractive as Warain, not as strikingly white as Phleng, but the naked body of the slender frame lying close on the bed was so eye-catching that even someone as experienced as Phra Phai had to swallow hard several times. His sharp eyes stared from the slender, long neck, down to the beautiful collarbones, the flat but not overly dry chest—there was flesh to stroke and knead to his heart’s content—the firm, tight hips that were tempting to squeeze, the long legs that were tempting to bite, not to mention the prominent, light-colored parts that were even more stiff from the air conditioning breeze. All of this, tinged with a flush from the fever, made him almost have to mentally chant expanding, contracting in his heart.
“Just a little bit, can I?… Damned shit-lizard, Phra Phai!”
Phra Phai knew he was being wicked, but the naked body in front of him was just too seductive.
Whoosh!
Be a good person, Phra Phai. But what made him regain his composure was not his minimal goodness, but Sky, who was shivering so hard he curled up on the soft bed. That alone made the well-built young man swiftly move forward to wipe Sky’s face and neck, alternating with trips to the bathroom to wring out fresh water, coming back to wipe his body, his back, his sweat-soaked arms to make him more comfortable.
Of course, someone like Phra Phai would never forget Nong Sky, managing until he was spotlessly clean.
“I still haven’t done anything, Warain. I just wiped him down.” He offered a slight excuse to heaven and earth.
Yeah, wiped every nook and cranny, called it the ultimate worth it, Phra Phai thought.
Then, he rummaged for clothes to put on the unconscious young man. At first, he was quite pleased to see him wearing just one pajama top, but upon thinking that he would be acting as a hot water bottle all night, the thought of leaving those long legs exposed like that flew right out of his head.
If I rub here and there and get turned on, I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to restrain myself, Phra Phai thought.
Satisfied with his work, once he had taken care of Sky, he wrapped him in a thick blanket, carried him down to lie on the floor temporarily, managed to change the bedsheets neatly, then placed the sick young man back on the spotlessly clean bed again. Then he looked at the result.
Phra Phai was confident he had never done this for anyone in his life. Seeing the face of the young man who was more comfortable and relaxed, turning over to snuggle into the pillow contentedly, he felt an indescribable pride.
“Hahaha, anyone who knew would laugh their bloody fucking ass off. Phra Phai takes care of him for free, without expecting any compensation, to the point of being in this state.”
Now it was not Sky who was drenched in sweat anymore; it was Phra Phai, soaked with sweat from the exertion, both from water splashing while wringing the towel. The tall young man walked to the wardrobe again, taking the opportunity to grab clothes, searching for large-sized ones and elastic-waist pants that would probably fit, then disappeared into the bathroom again.
By the time he came out of the bathroom, it was past 9 PM.
Having been around here, Phra Phai knew this time did not lessen the liveliness around the dorm at all. The later it got, the more students there were. And he had not prepared to stay over from the start. If he went back home to get his things and come back, it would waste time. But to sit and watch over the sick young man without eating anything seemed like torturing himself too much.
The young man starving, with his stomach growling, went to check on the sick young man’s condition again.
Sky’s complexion was much better than in the evening.
Mwah!
The young man who said he would not do anything took advantage of the little one’s unconscious state to lean in and press a firm kiss on the forehead, then moved his lips to whisper by Sky’s ear.
“Be a good boy and wait for me. I’ll be back soon.”
Even without an answer, Phra Phai took the relaxed expression of the deeply sleeping young man as acceptance. His attractive face broke into a wide smile. Affection surged even more in his heart, making him rub his cheek against the clear cheek once before resolutely grabbing his wallet, mobile phone, along with the room key he had just freshly obtained, and quickly leaving the room.
He should go and come back quickly.
Phra Phai did not care why he was so worried about the sick young man. He just was worried, so why overthink and complicate things with reasons?
“Tell your Mia not to worry. It’s Phra Phai, for goodness sake.”
[It’s precisely because it’s you that my Mia is worried.]
Phra Phai did not take long to get two boxes of rice, two bags of porridge, several kinds of medicine, a toothbrush, and a razor. But just as he was walking back to Sky’s dorm, his phone rang first. And the caller was none other than… Payu.
Now the dark-skinned young man laughed loudly at what the young man on the other end said.
Phra Phai thought he had never shown his true colors to Warain. Consider that youth’s instincts were sharp, that’s all.
Entrusting Sky to Phra Phai was no different from entrusting grilled fish to a cat, Payu thought.
“I didn’t do anything at all. Just nursed him as seemed appropriate.”
When he was cold, I hugged him. When he sweated, I wiped him down. When I wiped him down, I touched him with a cloth, Phra Phai thought.
“See? I should even get a medal for outstanding nursing.”
[Phra Phai]
However, his laughter quieted when he heard the serious tone from the other end of the line.
[I know what kind of young man you are. If you have no regard for Warain, I want you to remember that, no matter what, that youth is also my Nong.]
Payu was saying that if Phra Phai did not care about his romantic partner, he should care about Payu a little. Phra Phai stopped walking, the playful smile disappearing from his face, leaving only a thoughtful gaze.
Hmm, Phra Phai thought.
It was not just Sky who thought he was teasing. Even a friend like Payu saw him no differently. This made Phra Phai respond with an even more serious tone.
“And what if I’m serious?”
Even without seeing his face, I know he’s stunned, Phra Phai thought.
“Hey! Enough, enough. We’ll talk later. Tell Warain that Nong Sky woke up once already. He’s sound asleep now. Don’t worry, because I’m not so evil as to do anything to a sick young man.”
But a little bit doesn’t count, Phra Phai thought.
Phra Phai crossed his fingers and changed the subject.
“That’s all.”
Then he put the phone in his pocket, took the opportunity to follow other dorm residents using their access cards to go up, heading straight to the sick young man’s room. He did not have even a shred of thought to eat at the restaurant first before coming back up. He admitted he did not want to leave Sky sleeping alone for long.
I’m probably really into him! Phra Phai thought.
“I’m back, Khrap. Has Nong Sky been a good boy?”
“Hng! No, don’t… don’t!”
Thud!
The young man who was closing the door turned sharply to look at the source of the startling sound immediately. Upon seeing it, Phra Phai dropped the things he was carrying at the entrance in an instant, leaping toward the young man on the bed who was tossing and turning restlessly, his expression looking tormented. In just half an hour, the young man who had just changed clothes was drenched in sweat again.
“Sky, what’s wrong?”
Smack!
The tall young man reached out, intending to touch the forehead to check for fever, but before his fingertips could make contact, the sick young man swatted his hand away with a startled flinch, making Phra Phai freeze.
The sick young man still had his eyes tightly shut, but the eyebrows, which had relaxed earlier, were now knitted together even more tightly. Sweat beaded all over his face, and he shook his head on the pillow as if fighting a nightmare. His throat emitted groans resembling sobs, but there were no tears. His body trembled as if facing fear, making the onlooker anxious.
“Sky, it’s me. It’s Phra Phai. It’s me, Khrap.” The young man dropped to sit beside the bed, speaking in a comforting tone. But the moment their bodies touched, the young man trapped in the nightmare gasped sharply, trying to break away even though he was unconscious.
“No, please… don’t do me. Let me go… let me go… don’t… please.”
Not to mention these mournful groans as if his heart was breaking.
The more Phra Phai watched, the more torment he felt in his heart.
Phra Phai hesitated for only a moment.
Smack!
“Hngg, no. Let go, let me… let go. Hng! No, please… let me go.”
The young man decided to gather the sick young man into his embrace, but this only made Sky struggle with all his might. Two hands, devoid of strength, both tried to push, tried to hit. The voice, groaning both in torment and discomfort, the sound of panting breaths grew louder, making Phra Phai increase the strength of his tight embrace. The face usually adorned with a smile was now full of tension.
“It’s me, Nong Sky. It’s Phra Phai, Khrap. It’s me. Shhh, good boy.”
“Let go. Hng! Let go… let me go. Let go.”
“No, I won’t let go!”
Phra Phai did not know if the face in Sky’s nightmare looked like him, but his two arms held the slender frame even tighter, affirming firmly that he would not allow this youth to suffer alone!
“Calm down. I promise I won’t do anything to Sky. Be still, good boy.” Phra Phai could not believe there would be a day he’d sit hugging, comforting, rocking, trying to soothe someone he had almost no connection to. But the little one who had once given him icy cold looks was so pitiful that he could not leave him be.
The young man did not know what Sky was dreaming of, but this demeanor made the young man he thought was strong look fragile. So, the deep voice whispered over and over again without stopping.
“I’m right here. Staying with Sky. Nothing can hurt Sky at all.”
One arm hugged around the waist, the other hand stroked the damp locks of hair very gently. Sometimes he alternated, pressing kisses on the forehead, between the eyebrows, on the white cheeks. He showed no intention of letting go, no matter how much the sick young man struggled, tried to escape, or talked in his delirium. It took a long while before the young man having the nightmare calmed down again.
“Be still, good boy.”
Even though his good boy had returned to nestle against his chest with a much better complexion, Phra Phai was still not reassured. He continued to stroke the back comfortingly, whispering soothing words for a while longer, until he heard the rhythmic, steady breathing indicating Sky was deeply asleep again. Only then did his two hands gently place the slender frame back to lie on the soft mattress.
Smack!
But the young man who seemed to be sound asleep reached out to grab Phra Phai’s shirt again, frowning as if displeased that the wonderfully safe warmth was moving away from him.
“I’m right here. Not going anywhere.”
Once he whispered comfortingly, the gripping hand gradually loosened. But Phra Phai did not hurriedly get up to deal with the things he had just bought. He instead lay on his side like that, his sharp eyes watching the flushed face unblinkingly, his gaze full of confusion mixed with anxiety.
I don’t know what Sky saw, but I want to be the one to eliminate it completely! Phra Phai thought.
“What kind of things have you been through?”
Now the well-built young man began to suspect whether this nightmare had anything to do with the other young man trying to push him away. What had Sky been through? Why did this youth seem familiar with bedroom matters but set incredibly high walls against him? The young man was curious about everything, wanted to know every story until the lump of flesh in his chest burned hot.
“Tell me, Khrap.” Phra Phai knew full well the other young man would never tell, but he still hoped to hear it from his mouth.
“Sigh! What’s wrong with you, bloody fucking hell? Wanting to know about someone else’s past isn’t like you at all, Phra Phai.”
It isn’t like me, but if it makes me know more about the young man lying in my arms, I’m willing to change my habits, Phra Phai thought.
Phra Phai continued to lie like that, observing Sky’s expression. Whenever the eyebrows knitted together, he would gently rub them until he was sure they relaxed. Over and over again, for hours, until he finally resolutely pulled away to answer the calls of his stomach growling loudly, reminding himself that he needed to put the porridge in the refrigerator.
However, the well-built young man did not stray far from the bedside. His sharp eyes remained fixed on the smooth, fair face that became more captivating the longer he looked. Until he finished the box of food, tidied everything up, brushed his teeth at lightning speed, then returned to stay in the same spot… being Sky’s pillow.
“Hnggg.”
Phra Phai heard the faint, now familiar groan, so he did not promptly notice the pale eyelids twitching and slowly opening.
“Who?” the sick young man asked in a hoarse, blurred voice. Two hands pushed with force, making the young man look down.
“It’s Phra Phai, Khrap.”
Phra Phai rubbed the tip of his nose affectionately, thinking Sky was probably sleep-talking like before. But…
“Phra Phai… Rahad, right?”
The pronoun, knowing it was the correct form of address, came out from the dry lips. It made Phra Phai open his eyes wide, then even more surprised when the sick young man, upon recognizing who he was, was the one to move to lie pillowed on Phra Phai’s chest, finding a comfortable position again until he buried his face in the crook of Phra Phai’s neck and stopped moving. Two hands gripped the shirt Phra Phai was wearing tightly.
“Cold.”
Smack!
As soon as the little one said he was cold, Phra Phai hugged him tightly, pulling the comforter over them, not afraid that he would die of heat.
Just having him lie on my chest is enough to make my heart almost fail! And now he’s acting cute, asking for warmth too! Phra Phai thought.
Phra Phai thought that alone was enough to make him almost break, but it was nothing compared to the muttered words that followed.
“Don’t let go… hug me.”
Bloody fucking adorable!
Once again, Phra Phai exclaimed loudly in his heart.
Who would have thought that when a coldly-aloof young man acts attractive like this, someone like me could also melt into a puddle? Phra Phai thought.
It was not just the passion in bed. It was not just the cold gaze that he liked. Even the weak, fragile aspects, or even the clinginess, made him interested to the point he could not look away from the young man in his arms!
Why did I ever think this youth looked ordinary? What ordinary youth could order me to just lie hugging without thinking of “that” kind of thing? Moreover, he made me so worried I slept fitfully, kept getting up to check his temperature all night. When I tried to get up, he’d hug my waist tightly, forcing me to lie back down, dedicating myself to being a body pillow willingly. This is beyond handling already, Phra Phai thought.
“So bloody fucking wicked.”
But he liked this kind of wickedness, you know. Especially hearing the mutter against his chest.
“Phra Phai.”
For this job, even if I were a black giant, I’d surrender, bloody fucking hell, Phra Phai thought.
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