TL Chapter 11

Today, Dear felt like everyone around him was acting strangely. Since morning, that artish young man Âi Shin-jang had walked over and stated simply, as if he'd never made those dramatic, life-or-death refusals before," ...I'm joining cheer tonight." His hand was wrapped in bandages. When asked about it, he just answered...

"Oh, I wanted to test how tough and durable a concrete curb was. So I sacrificed myself and used my hand to find out."

Then there was his good close friend, who'd lately been acting like a giraffe, constantly craning his long neck searching for someone all through lunch break. When questioned, he retorted...

"A shortie like you shouldn't bother with matters concerning a tall person like me."

"Yeah, Âi-lofty-one." Ptooey!

And it didn't end there. At the evening cheer meeting, why did his spine keep tingling? He felt like the Phîi wáks were targeting him specifically, especially that Âi-black-shirted senior whose bag and shop shirt he'd helped carry. Every time he looked up, he felt like that gloomy-faced, bearded guy who looked like a bandit king was staring at him constantly.

What the fucking hell kind of day is this, Khrap?!

So, the moment he stepped into the condo at eight on the dot, his round eyes darted left and right, afraid he'd run into another weirdo. But the whole room was pitch black, a sure sign his roommate wasn't back yet.

"Finished, criminal. I'm gonna game to my heart's content, hehe." With that, the guy exhausted from the cheer meeting ran cheerfully into the bedroom, hurriedly showered and changed, then seized control of the area in front of the television, brazenly snatching the coolest game to play without a thought for the actual owner.

Anyway, I'm already a dog with an owner. The owner probably won't mind if I borrow this to play.

"These days, I'm so rad, Âi Dear. If Phîi Porsche says I'm a dog, then I'll consent to be a dog." He shook his head slightly, then lost interest in the 'rad or not' debate when he remembered there were hundreds of games on his roommate's console he hadn't tried yet. He planned to play while waiting. He'd turn it off and go to sleep whenever the other guy returned.

But between the exhaustion from a full day of classes, being teased by his Âi-wicked friends, and the strange, intense pressure from the Phîi wáks' stares, Nai Daranpat finally passed out, face-planted on the TV.

***

The short hand was well past twelve by the time Purin opened the door and walked in. The light flooding the room made the man who'd just been out drinking with close friends frown sharply. His long legs kicked off his shoes and he stepped inside, only to see the TV screen displaying the main menu of an adventure game.

"Finished playing, why not turn it off?" the young man muttered softly, tossing his document bag and suit jacket onto the sofa. But as he walked around, he saw... the puppy, curled up in a ball in front of the television.

He wasn't exaggerating one bit. The little red-mouthed kid was curled up asleep because the AC was cranked way too high. Dear was only wearing a thin white tank top and oversized basketball shorts. He could see the junior hugging his own pale arms. His tousled head, with jet-black hair falling across his cheeks, rested on a nice cushion pillow. He was sleeping so soundly it was enviable, but also kind of pitiful.

"Why sleep here? You'll get sick," Purin shook his head, squatting down to pull the game controller out and shut the system down. He pushed the whole game set into a drawer, then turned to look at the little puppy.

The red-mouthed puppy who, today, seemed inexplicably alluring and tempting.

"Are you still drunk or what, huh, Âi Porsche?" The young man shook his head, trying to get a grip, but his eyes kept drifting to those beautiful lips peeking out from dark locks of hair. Then his gaze inadvertently fell on the pale arms covered only by a thin tank top. He couldn't help but feel this Âi-littt-one was just so tiny.

Probably can carry him. His body's probably about the same size as Dream's.

Purin swatted the thought away again. His junior was a man, and a grown-up one at that. He'd probably yell loud enough to shake the room if he knew he'd tried to carry him to bed like a girl. Plus, he'd just have to run after him to clear up the misunderstanding. So, Purin instead reached out and poked his upper arm lightly.

"Dear, wake up. What are you doing sleeping here..."

"Buy… Mâa-Máa, ah. Dear will sleep." Instead of getting up, the kid pulled his shoulder away, mumbled faintly, and snuggled his face deeper into the soft cushion pillow. The guy watching almost burst out laughing.

"Then go sleep in your room."

"Dear, I said wake up and go sleep in your room." Seeing his junior was still and seemed to have fallen back into a deep sleep, Purin shook his arm a little harder. He could feel the biting cold from the AC breeze on the kid's white skin. It was so cold he had to grab his arm and rub it lightly, as if trying to transfer some warmth.

Soft.

Yes, the first sensation from touching his childhood neighbor's skin was its softness. Even though it was cold, the skin was incredibly soft and smooth.

"Ugh...Jae Dream, I ask for five minutes...jep jep." This time, he wasn't sleep-talking about his Mâe; he was calling for his older sister. The would-be waker shook his head helplessly, withdrawing his hand from the boy's arm before this strange feeling could fully cloud his judgment. Looking at those white cheeks, Purin felt that it was....cute, maybe.

"Not your Mâe, not your sister, that's it... time to wake up, you troublesome thing." Yet, the young man didn't give up trying to rouse his junior. But seeing the kid's completely unyielding posture, Purin fell silent for a moment. Then his sharp eyes gleamed. A thought flashed through his head, unbidden.

I wonder if this would wake him up? Worth a try.

"Wake up already, Khrap, Nong puppy. Your owner's home. Quick, go to bed with your owner, quick," Purin said, not in his normal voice, but leaning down to whisper right by his ear. He fully intended to tease his Nong, who would definitely yell at him when he woke up. He was indescribably amused by this owner-and-puppy role they had going.

Well, Dear is probably as endearing as a little dog.

"Ugh..." But then, Dear, who wouldn't wake up no matter what, blearily opened his eyes. He mumbled in his throat.

"Owner or...." His sleep-drunk, not-fully-awake expression made Purin laugh in amusement. He meant to reach out and ruffle his head affectionately. If it weren't for...

Thump

Kiss...smack

If it weren't for the young man throwing both arms around his strong neck, using his bleary eyes to look up, and leaning in to press a kiss onto his well-defined lips, making the owner of said lips widen his eyes in shock. That wasn't enough. The little puppy then pulled back and flicked his fresh pink tongue out to lick Purin's lips lightly, just like a puppy showering its owner with affection.

"Dear..." Purin groaned in disbelief. His whole heart nearly stopped at the person who'd moved in to kiss him first. Then, a second later, the red-mouthed kid smiled, eyes closed, and said in a drowsy voice,

"Owner's back already, Khrap?"

Thud

With that, Dear released his hold on the neck, stood up, and staggered like a sleep-drunk man toward his own bedroom, mumbling something Purin heard perfectly clearly with both ears.

"Umm, sleep, sleep with owner… sleep..."

Bang!

The little kid, sleepwalking, had vanished into his small bedroom, leaving behind only the teasing older man sitting frozen in place. His heart, which had skipped a beat, was now pounding so hard he could feel it. A large hand gently touched his own lips. Even though he'd kissed Dear many, many times before, it was nothing compared to the feeling of that soft mouth touching his just now.

It felt like....being teased.

"Damn it, have you been so deprived of women that you think a sleep-talking junior is teasing you? Besides, since when would Dear ever tease someone like that?" Purin shook his head immediately, lifting a hand to rub his temples. He blamed himself for kissing his junior so much that he was now delirious, thinking that Âi-drowsy, bleary-eyed look and that clear voice...

Was unbelievably sexy.

Your junior is a man, how can he be sexy?

The man roughly rubbed his own head, grabbed his suit jacket, and headed into his room, hoping a shower would clear his head, all while asking himself just one thing...

"Am I really being teased by that puppy?"

Bang

Thump

"Aaaahhhhhhh!!!"

The moment the door clicked shut, the person who'd been sleepwalking as a dog licking its owner's mouth flew wide awake. All drowsiness vanished. He jumped onto his bed, pulled a pillow over his mouth, and screamed into it at the top of his lungs. Every hair on his body stood on end in horror at his own actions. Just thinking about using his tongue to lick Phîi Porsche's mouth...

"Damn itttt! How could I do that, huh? Âi-rad-Dear-ia, how could you do it!!!" Dear whined in a whisper, burying himself in his bed. He had to confess he'd actually woken up when Phîi Porsche started rubbing his arm. He didn't know what fucking devil Satan spirit had possessed him to think such a perverted thing.

Well, it was Phîi Porsche whispering teasingly in his ear that made Âi Sailor Moon partner's words flash into his head.

If he kisses, then kiss back. Since Phîi started it... I just teased him back! What's wrong with that?!

So, as soon as Phîi Porsche finished speaking, he'd turned swiftly and planted a full kiss on his mouth. Plus, he'd pretended to be sleepwalking! Licked his lips like a puppy loving its owner one more time! And then... fled! Why stick around to get caught?

"Janjao… Bulun, you guys wanted me to get all flustered. Now I'm more than flustered; I'm more stunned and dumbfounded than in any of those novels you read... how could I do that, huh?" He could only ask himself where he'd found the courage. His cheeks were burning; he could only bury his face motionlessly in the pillow, thinking about Phîi Porsche's gaze.

Thump

The thought made Dear flop onto his back on the bed. He looked up at the ceiling. And his mouth... chose to smile.

"Just wait and see!"

"Who knows, maybe. Phîi gave Dear hope himself... from now on, if Phîi flirts, Dear will flirt back.

But the person who'd said he'd flirt back had fled flat-out to the university before the room's owner had even woken up.

"Âi Dear, do you want a Phûa who's the Faculty Moon or what, huh?"

"Hmm, Phîi Porsche..."

Thud

Damn it, Âi Daranpat! What did you let slip out?!

Dear, who'd been engrossed in poking at his iPhone, blurted it out the instant his friend asked. But the moment his roommate's name slipped out, his hands froze. He turned swiftly to look at his two close friends (that he was, by necessity, close to), who were staring at him intensely. And he really didn't want to say it... but they were looking at him with extremely suspicious eyes.

"Eek, what kind of crazy question is that, huh? I don't have any Phûa or anything like that!" Once he regained his composure, he hurriedly said in a trembling voice, his tongue nearly tying itself in knots. His demeanor was extremely suspicious, making Âi-half-breed, who was crossing his arms and stroking his chin, smirk viciously, while Âi Sun widened his eyes and leaned in closer.

"I think, Âi Sun, your Mia has a lover. Since when does someone ask if you want a Phûa to be the Faculty Moon, and you answer with another guy's name?" Âi Shin-jang elbowed the friend sitting next to him, waiting for class. Âi Sun made a thoughtful face before he.... let his mouth hang open.

Cute to death, alas, friend.

"Are you cheating on me?"

He didn't even want to say that just seeing your gaping mouth makes me want to vomit. Don't you dare make that pouting sound as if your Mia went and spread their legs for him! Horrifying, seriously."

"You guys, enough! There's nothing going on at all. See, I was playing a racing game, right? So I was calling out 'Porsche, Porsche,' here, look, I crashed into the curb, Deard, fuck, game over, and it's your fault!" Dear hurriedly made excuses, encountering the stares of Âi these two as if he were a criminal in a rape-murder case.

If they're gonna stare, I'll stare back. Bring it on. Not afraid anyway.

Dear could only think this, his big eyes darting around, as Âi-half-breed turned to Âi Sun and spoke as if he weren't right there.

"Have you ever warned your friend not to become a robber? The police would've arrested him the moment he walked into the bank."

"I don't think he'd even make it into the bank. The security guard out front probably already knows he's suspicious."

Okay, I'm a terrible liar. I can't fool people. So what? What right do you guys have to criticize me, you bunch of fresh mushrooms, eek!

"Enough, you guys! I'm sitting here all alone..."

"Oh, is he here too? Âi Shin-jang, look down low. Yeah, he's sitting here too, you..."

Whap

"Ouch!!! Hahahaha, don't hurt me, Khrap, you sir. Ouch, you, I'm scared already, hahahaha!" Âi Sun's mouth wasn't dog-like enough; he even reached out to rub Dear's head, making the one being rubbed grit his teeth, grod.

He grabbed a textbook as thick as a buffalo and smacked him right on the head. Âi close friend yelled loudly while also laughing uproariously, making everyone turn to look. But may he ask, did Âi-these-two handsome guys care?... Not one bit.

"Enough about my height already! So, what were you guys asking me?" Dear could only heave a huge sigh before turning back to ask what they'd been talking about. He didn't want to admit that just moments ago, his mind had been filled with thoughts of the person whose name had slipped out.

"Oh, did you know yet that Âi Sun is our room's representative for the Faculty Moon contest?" Shin-jang, who was now unwrapping some Lay's to eat (and sorry, Khrap, the manner of the gentleman young master raising an eyebrow slightly), made the listener feel irritated.

Besides being artish, can't you stop posing? All the girls in the room are looking at you like they want to offer themselves up.

"Didn't know. And whether he gets it or not, what's it to me, huh?" Dear shrugged, uncaring. He'd already expected the room would vote for Âi Sun. The guy was practically Father Sunshine, known by everyone. Plus, his face was undeniably good-looking. It'd be strange if he wasn't selected.

"Oh, I just asked. In case his Mia wants a Phûa who's the Faculty Moon. Âi Sun will have more motivation to compete," Shin said with a shrug before turning to look at the other friend, who was sitting with his chin in his hand, checking out the girls in the room. He waved back at anyone who waved at him.

"Then go ask his Mia. Luckily, you've never 'had' me. End of story, Khrap, friend?" Finished speaking, he pushed the head of Âi-Korean-drama-hero-lookalike half-breed again, making Âi Shin merely smooth his hair back into place. But his friend's comment piqued his interest a little.

"Yeah, but I think you should go for it. That Faculty Moon title. Then I can strut around saying my friend is the Moon. And I guarantee, half the faculty's girls will start secretly crushing on you." It was almost a clean sweep already. He'd heard about half their year liked him already.

Thud

"Âi Dear, say it again. You said if I become the Moon, will people like me more?" But then, Âi the guy who'd been spacing out and people-watching turned swiftly to look his friend straight in the face. The one about to return to his racing game turned back, confused, and saw his eyes gleaming with a strange hope.

"Uh... probably... yes, that's right. I mean, what girl wouldn't be thrilled to have a boyfriend with the prestige of being Faculty Moon?" Dear could only answer confusedly. The listener nodded emphatically to himself, so Dear just let him continue his crazy train of thought while he bent down to check Facebook statuses to kill time.

"Yeah, Âi Shin-jang, I went on your Facebook yesterday. Who's this kid?" But then, Dear remembered—Âi-extremely-artish Khun-chai half-breed (his title got longer every day, didn't it?) had finally accepted his friend request. No, he'd accepted the other friends too. When asked, he'd said...

Oh, I felt the number of my friends was inauspicious. So I accepted more.

He'd just seen a picture of him with a young man. The guy's appearance could only be described as cute. Like a main character from a Yaoi manga that the Sailor Moon partners liked to read.

He opened it. The question seemed to make Shin pause for a second before he leaned over to look at the picture his friend was showing him. "What, who's that? Your little brother? So pale. Really cute too. Makes me wanna have a little brother..." The asker didn't notice his friend's reaction, asking curiously and scrolling through the photos, making Shin-jang heave a heavy sigh.

"This person, fa...."

"I WILL BE THE FACULTY MOON!!!"

Swish

Don't even ask, Khrap, who the guy is that uttered that supremely confident sentence. Because before Âi Shin-jang could even finish speaking, Âi-spaced-out-one blurted it out loudly, making them all turn to look in unison at Âi Sun, who was grinning from ear to ear with a determined glint in his eyes. Anyone who knew him as well as his own liver and kidneys could tell immediately... that smile meant a surefire evil plan!

"You guys listen up! I'm gonna become the Faculty Moon for you to see!" The two friends exchanged a quick glance. Âi Shin-jang turned back to munch on his Lay's, uninterested, while Dear intended to ask his friend more about who the person in the picture was.

Thump

"Hey! My phone!"

"Come on, let me borrow it... as atonement for your intent to cheat on me, Dear. Plus, for hitting me with a textbook. I'm borrowing it for a bit." With that, Âi-jerkwho'd just made that irritating announcement about being the handsomest in the faculty bowed his head and started tapping away on his friend's iPhone. The owner of the device let out a long sigh.

"Âi Shin, may I borrow..."

Thwack!

"Ah, take it. And be quiet. I can't concentrate on eating my Lay's."

Someday I'm gonna kill you two and bury you in the woods behind the faculty!

Dear could only gnash his teeth as he caught the beautiful black iPhone 5S he'd seen Âi Shin-jang just buy a few days ago. And the young master gentleman had thrown it at his face! Didn't even hand it over properly! Didn't care if it fell and broke! And then he says... 'no concentration to eat snacks.'

In all my born days, you're the only person I've met who needs concentration to eat snacks.

Meanwhile, Sun was navigating his friend's phone to the contacts list. It didn't take long. The name he wanted 'Thief" appeared right there.

Scrolling…

Hehe, I've got a great idea now, Khrap, beautiful Phîi Ryu.

"Hello, Khrap."

Ryu was sitting under the department building, waiting for his groupmates who'd gone to see the professor. His phone rang in his pocket. A strange number he didn't recognize made its owner offer a polite greeting.

"Hello, who is this, Khrap?" But the caller didn't speak, making the owner pull the phone away slightly and frown sharply.

"If you're not going to talk, I'm hanging up..."

"It's me."

Which 'me', Âi Sun? How the hell should I know?

The guy, who was quick to frustration, cursed up a storm in his heart before speaking again sharply.

"And which 'me' would that be, Khrap?"

"It's just me, Khrap. Me, Khrap."

Damn it. Âi'damned-nuisance is annoying me again.

Ryu made a frustrated face, true to his short-fused nature, ready to just hang up, dammit. But the caller seemed to sense it, as a laugh sounded down the line immediately.

"Ah-ah, don't hang up yet, Khrap, Phîi. Hey, just joking. Khee khee..."

Khee your ass.

The listener thought to himself, though a premonition was telling him this familiar voice belonged to... Don't tell me it's...

"It's Sun, Khrap, beautiful Phîi Ryu."

"Âi XXX" The instant that supremely annoying introduction was over, Ryu let out a stream of profanity unfit for public consumption (lest he get banned (?)). The person on the other end laughed uproariously.

"Ouch, should I be happy that Phîi talks to me so much better than to others?"

"What the fuck did you call for? You that bored? If you're so bored, go home and plough a field, Âi—"

"Oh, Phîi Ryu, Khrap. No, come on. I called because I have a proposal."

Thud

Ryu fell silent for a beat. His first instinct was to ask how he got his number, but that was a stupid question—his friend was also his junior by student ID; getting his number wouldn't be hard. So he'd wait and see what move this kid, who'd been acting nice and carried his bag the other day, was trying to pull.

"What is it? My time is money."

"I called to challenge you, Phîi."

Hmm. What's his angle?

It seemed the kid knew what he was thinking, as he immediately explained further.

"I know you'd never agree to speak nicely to me otherwise. So here's the challenge... if I become the Faculty Moon, you have to agree to speak nicely to me... nicely, meaning call me 'Sun', call yourself 'Phîi', and no cursing me. Okay?"

"Are you insane? Like I'd agree. Nerves, huh." What sane person would accept a crazy bet like this? What was in it for him? Nothing.

Ryu shook his head, thinking. This kid must have lost his marbles since I kicked him in the chest. The other day he carried his bag, today he spouts this nonsense.

"Chicken, I tell you."

Thud

"What did you say?!"

"Chicken, Khrap. Total chicken. Super chicken. Not accepting the challenge. Do, thought you were tough." Immediately, the hot-tempered guy flared up, his face reddening. He rolled up his sleeve, gripping the phone tightly, trying to keep his cool. This is clearly a trap.

"Âi damned kid!!! Where am I chicken? Why should I accept? I get nothing out of it except having to suppress the urge to curse you. You must think I'm really stupid, cha—"

"If I don't become the Faculty Moon, I'll be your slave for a full month. You can use me for anything. Anything at all." But then, Sun interjected with a laugh. The guy who'd been about to curse fell silent. Before he could say anything, the damned kid continued immediately.

"What's wrong, Khrap? Hey, Khun-nŭu Ryu doesn't dare to accept the challenge? Really chicken..."

"Who says I don't dare? FINE!!! You want a bet so bad? Then prepare to be my punching bag!!!"

The words burst out, laced with condescension. The person on this end was shouting into the phone, all composure gone. How many times had he been called cowardly since this junior started talking?

He hung up immediately, furious. So angry that when his friends came down to find him, he stormed out from under the building.

Just you wait. I'll work you like a real slave, Âi Sun.

At the same time, the person who was happily stirring up trouble for himself was laughing with glee. He even pressed a kiss to his phone. He knew Phîi Ryu must be furious by now. But he didn't know why he was doing this. He'd just been inspired by what Âi Dear said—that anyone would like you if you were Faculty Moon.

Inspired, and by the voice he'd secretly dreamed of hearing several times.

"Sun... tell Phîi, what's your room number?"

Like that. Just Phîi Ryu speaking nicely to him for a few words. But he didn't know... I wanted to hear it again so badly I had to do something crazy.